


Journey Into Dreams

by Red_Dahlia



Category: Bleach
Genre: Drama, F/M, Romance, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-06-06
Updated: 2012-06-28
Packaged: 2017-11-07 00:42:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 30,492
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/425035
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Red_Dahlia/pseuds/Red_Dahlia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nanao's vacation takes an unexpected turn when Captain Kyōraku follows her to the Fourteenth District.  Spoilers for the Lost Substitute Shinigami Arc.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Contains: Spoilers for the Lost Substitute Shinigami Arc, consensual adult activity in later chapters.  
> This will be a five chapter story, around thirty thousand words. I tried to work some of my slots on [my fanbingo card](http://pics.livejournal.com/r_dahlia/pic/00001qyz) into this story. Fanbingo is a [community at Dreamwidth.](http://fanbingo.dreamwidth.org/)

"I'm going to the Living World for a little while, Nanao-chan."

Nanao looked up from her paperwork, surprised. Captain Kyōraku leaned against her desk. "To the Living World?"

He smiled. "Yes. I'm going to visit Lisa-chan and our other friends."

She studied his face, waiting. He looked tired, and needed a shave—she hadn't seen him well-rested since he'd come back from the battle at Karakura weeks ago. She suspected his injuries had taken more of a toll on him than he would admit.

He didn't say anything else, and she realized that no invitation for her to come with him was forthcoming. Her eyes widened. He was always inviting her along with him, to all manner of things, no matter that she generally refused his offers. But now he wasn't inviting her on a trip to see Lisa? An ugly feeling coiled in her stomach, like a snake. She turned back to her paperwork.

"I'll be back with you soon, Nanao-chan." She glanced up at his eyes, and saw that he knew she'd expected an invitation, that she was surprised not to get one. Perhaps he could even see the snake in her belly.

"Goodbye, then. It's not as if you are needed here, Captain," she said, her voice icy. She flipped through her paperwork, ignoring him.

"I know my Nanao-chan will run the division beautifully in my absence." He covered her cold hand with his warm one.

She smacked him hard across the knuckles with her fan. "I am not your Nanao-chan."

He withdrew his hand. "When I come back, we'll have to talk—a real talk, Nanao-chan."

Her brow creased. He looked sad, and that made fear curl around her heart. "I don't know what you mean."

"Yes, you do." He tipped his hat at her and walked toward the door.

"Captain Unohana said you should avoid strain, so don't get into any fights or anything like that. Take—" _Take me with you._ "Take care, Captain."

He waved at her over his shoulder as he left. There was a weight pressing down on her, and she slumped back in her chair.

There'd been a strange silence between them since the Winter War, and it was only growing deeper. It'd started after the battle in Karakura, when she'd supervised Captain Kyōraku's transfer to a stretcher. He was unconscious, and she'd allowed herself to grasp his hand in a moment of weakness, tears pooling in her eyes.

"Nanao Ise? Nanao-chan?"

She'd turned at the sound of her name. "Vice Captain Yadōmaru."

Lisa's eyes had dropped to Nanao's hand, curled around Captain Kyōraku's large one. Lisa's eyes narrowed.

Nanao sighed at the memory. The conversation that followed had been civil, of course. The one that followed a few days later was just as courteous. Still, Nanao found herself looking down sometimes to make sure that the ground was solidly under her feet; everything seemed to be shifting around her. The stasis that her relationship with Captain Kyōraku had existed in for so long was dissolving, but it was not melting into the material of her dreams. Instead the silence cut a chasm between them. And now her Captain had gone to see Lisa—without Nanao.

She stood, bracing her hands against the desk and then marching out of her office. "Third Seat Enjōji," she said, and the officer jumped up from his slouched position behind his desk.

"Yes, Vice Captain Ise?"

"You will be in charge until Captain Kyōraku returns. You will throw no parties, skip no work, and cause no property damage, or you will be most regretful."

"Yes, Vice Captain! But, ah, what will I tell the Captain when he asks about you?" Enjōji was clearly uncomfortable, shifting his weight from foot to foot.

She paused, already turned away from his desk. "Tell him that I am unavailable." She took off down the hall at a brisk pace.

"For how long? Vice Captain Ise, how long will you be away?" She ignored Enjōji's calls as she walked out of the Eighth Division.

* * *

Nanao followed the scenic trail through the forest. Her eyes took in her surroundings without really seeing them. It was her second day at this picturesque vacation spot in the Fourteenth District, and she was almost certain coming out here had been a mistake. She felt no better about her situation with Captain Kyōraku than she had back at the Eighth. Physical distance had not granted her the emotional distance she desired.

She heard the sounds of a scuffle up ahead, and sped up her pace. Three men surrounded an elderly woman and a young girl, tearing items out of baskets and satchels. The men carried swords but were poorly dressed; Nanao thought they were likely bandits.

"Release them, now," she said, centering herself on the trail.

The bandits looked up. "Eh? You're a pretty one. Why don't we add you to our fun?" One of them smiled, displaying his unkempt teeth.

Nanao held up one hand, summoning a blue flame with a wordless kidō. She slipped off her glasses with the other hand, and let her spiritual power rise. Her eyes glowed with power, she knew, and her aura washed over the immediate area in drowning waves. It was a trick she'd learned from Captain Kyōraku, who preferred to avoid fights when possible. Although she told him often that he was too lazy, this trick didn't fall into the category of avoiding work. This was an excellent practice she was proud to have learned from him: it was always better to avoid a fight and not risk any casualties, especially when innocents were involved.

"She's a shinigami or something! Let's go!" The bandits dropped their pilfered goods and fled. Nanao let them go, settling her glasses back on her nose. The blue flame faded from her hand. The trail returned to the idyllic state it'd had moments ago.

The elderly woman and the girl bent to try and restore order to their spilled items. "Thank you for your help," the elderly woman said, struggling to stuff cloth back into a basket.

"Please, let me." Nanao hurried forward and crouched down to assist her.

"You're a shinigami?" The woman's eyes were a thin hazel, strong in her wrinkled face.

"Yes. I know the shinigami are unpopular in the Rukongai—"

"That's not as true in this area, since we depend on visitors to enjoy their tours here, staying in our inns, going to the hot springs, and buying souvenirs. Shinigami and others from Seireitei that come here usually have money to spend." The woman smiled, her teeth white and sharp.

Nanao smiled back. "I'm Nanao Ise, Vice Captain of the Eighth Division."

"We're very glad to meet you, Ise-san, and even gladder you came along when you did. I'm Chiyo, and this is my granddaughter, Misao-chan."

"It's nice to meet you." Nanao nodded at Misao. The girl had a narrow face with high cheekbones and eyes the same odd color as her grandmother's. Nanao judged her to be about fifteen. She smiled at Nanao, but did not speak. "Are incidents like this common?" Nanao asked.

"Not at all. Those men must be from outside the area. No one local would do anything like that. They'll regret it." Chiyo glanced in the direction the men had gone.

"You must have a strong local government."

Chiyo nodded. "Appropriate punishment is always done here. But there's no need to go on about such unpleasant topics. Are you staying at the Laughing Fox?"

"Yes, since yesterday. It's a lovely inn."

They gathered everything and put it back into reasonable order. Misao helped her grandmother to rise from her bend. "It is. This is considered one of the most romantic areas in the Rukongai, you know. It's an ideal spot to get away with your husband." Chiyo distributed the satchels and baskets around, allowing Nanao to carry one when she gestured for it.

"I'm not here with a husband. Actually, I'm alone." Nanao adjusted the weight of the basket as they walked toward the Laughing Fox.

Chiyo shared a look with her granddaughter. "You don't have a man with you? You know, I'm just a nosy old woman, but I thought when I saw you that you had a sadness to you. Having trouble with the man you love?"

"He doesn't—that is, there's no one like that," Nanao said, flushing.

"Don't be embarrassed, Ise-san, I understand perfectly. I may not look it now, but I turned heads in my day."

Nanao glanced at her silent granddaughter. "I can believe that very easily."

Chiyo smiled. "I've also raised many daughters and granddaughters. I have a lot of experience in matters like these. If there's anything I can do—"

"Thank you, Chiyo-san, but I don't think that there is anything like that."

"You're a sweet girl. Oh, perhaps there is something—we should thank you for your help, anyway. Let me give you a gift." Misao reached into one of the satchels. "We sell a variety of unique and powerful items. Take this." She gestured to Misao, who shyly held out a dull red ribbon.

Nanao accepted it hesitantly. "Thank you."

Chiyo laughed. "It's not just a ribbon. You take this, and tie it around your wrist and the wrist of the man you love, and he'll be yours."

Nanao eyed the ribbon warily. "It's a love spell?"

"Not quite, but that's close enough, in this case. Please accept it with our gratitude."

The ribbon lacked sheen and looked cheap, but it had an unexpected weight in her hand. Nanao shook her head. "Even if you gave me something like this, and I believed in the effects, I could never use it. That would be unethical. I'll accept your gratitude happily, but I have to refuse this ribbon."

"Oh? But it's just something to guide a man in the best direction. Men can be a bit dense sometimes, Ise-san." Chiyo smiled again.

Nanao didn't want to hurt the feelings of the woman, so she chose her words carefully. "That's true, but—I just can't accept something like this, Chiyo-san. If this could create false emotions in someone, then that love and any relationship that resulted would be based on a lie."

"If you use this, the one that you desire will want you in the same way. Doesn't that tempt you? A gift like this is a rare magic. We wouldn't sell this to just anyone, much less give it away to someone."

Nanao turned the ribbon over in her hand. If she were honest with herself, she could admit the idea of a love spell was tempting. To have her feelings returned by Captain Kyōraku—she shook her head. She didn't believe in love spells, and even if she did, using one would be manipulative. Any relationship obtained would be tainted; the victim couldn't truly consent, after all. "No, thank you. I deeply appreciate your offer, and I understand that this is a valuable item for you, but I can't accept it."

Chiyo took the ribbon from Nanao's outstretched hand. "No? We'll have to see if we can find something else to gift you, perhaps." She handed the ribbon to Misao, who accepted it with a downcast look.

The inn appeared as they rounded a bend in the trail. Fox statutes stood in front of the building, which was large and somehow whimsical, as if the architect had been playing a joke on everyone. "You're very kind, Chiyo-san. But there's no need to give me a gift. Are you staying at the Laughing Fox?"

"We'll be set up there this afternoon, seeing friends, relatives, rivals." She laughed.

"Rivals?" Nanao asked.

"Oh, yes." They entered the Laughing Fox and were led to by a pretty woman through the confusing corridors to a large room with low tables set up. Chiyo and Misao began industriously emptying their baskets out onto the tables. "Now, Ise-san, you must let me know if anything catches your attention."

Nanao unpacked the basket she'd carried in for Chiyo. There were all manner of ribbons, hair pins, dishes, and items she couldn't identify readily. Her eye was drawn to a sake set with a pattern of foxes on it—laughing, dancing, running across the ceramic. It was whimsical and fun and she thought if she were bringing a souvenir to Captain Kyōraku the dishes would do nicely.

But why would she get him a souvenir? He didn't even know she was gone, since he was away in the Living World.

"Nanao-chan is so pensive."

She jumped at the sound of his voice in her ear, containing a surprised squeak before it could escape. "Captain Kyōraku! What are you doing here?" He wasn't in uniform, though the pink haori still sat on his shoulders.

"Our Third Seat told me you'd gone, but he didn't know where. Luckily I knew you'd never leave without giving your information to someone. Rangiku-san told me where you were." He grinned, and a twinge of soreness fluttered through Nanao's heart.

"I left that information with the Women's Association in case of a budgetary crisis or other emergencies," she hissed.

"Being without my Nanao-chan is an emergency." He pouted.

She opened her mouth to argue further, but saw Chiyo and Misao watching them with avid interest. "Captain Kyōraku, this is Chiyo-san and her granddaughter, Misao-chan."

"I'm pleased to meet you. This area is so resplendent with beautiful women."

"I've heard that the Captain of the Eighth Division was a man of the most romantic sensibilities." Chiyo beamed at him.

"If you mean that he's a notorious flirt, that's certainly true," Nanao murmured, studying one of the sake cups. She felt his eyes on her face, but refused to look at him.

"I think I've fallen out of favor with my lovely Nanao-chan." She could see him making puppy eyes, but turned away.

"Indeed, sir, it may be so. Should you wish to regain the favor of your lady, might I humbly recommend one of our fine items? Beautiful women enjoy beautiful gifts." Chiyo waved her hand over a selection of hair ornaments.

"An excellent idea, Chiyo-san." He cooed at the items and flirted shamelessly with the elderly woman. Nanao ignored him, turning the sake cup over and over in her hands.

"A wonderful choice, Kyōraku-kun. So delicate and refined, a perfect complement for the lady." He chuckled while Chiyo gushed about his good taste.

"What do you think of this one, Nanao-chan?" He leaned down, close to her face.

His nearness sent a shiver down her spine and a wince through her heart. "I'm sure my opinion is unnecessary, Captain; you'll act to please yourself, anyway."

He was silent for a moment and then spoke very brightly. "This is the one, Chiyo-san." He exchanged money for something from the table. "Nanao-chan."

Her fingers tightened on the sake cup, and then she set it on the table with great care. She turned to face him, her eyes focused on the chest muscle visible through the opening in his kosode.

"Lovely flowers for my lovely Nanao-chan." He lifted the hair ornament in his hand and Nanao's breath caught. It was a fine piece, with delicate silk flowers in white and pink. He tucked it into her hair slowly, drawing his hand down her cheek. Her skin blushed when he touched her. "Lovely," he said, and there was something in his voice that made her eyes slip closed.

A _clank_ pulled her eyes open. She drew away from his hand. Misao righted the jar she'd knocked over while Chiyo scolded her quietly. Nanao's face flamed. She wanted to be away from him, from them, from everyone, immediately. "Please have a good afternoon, Chiyo-san, Misao-chan." She turned to leave.

"Wait, Ise-san, please accept this with our thanks," Chiyo-said, handing her a wrapped package.

"Thank you, but I couldn't—"

"I must insist, after what you did for us this afternoon."

"What did Nanao-chan do for you, Chiyo-san?" Captain Kyōraku sounded highly intrigued.

"Thank you, Chiyo-san." Nanao took the package and escaped as Chiyo began a recitation of the day's events.

She sighed deeply as she stepped into the hall. Her room was at the end of one of these corridors, or was it up some stairs? She'd almost say that the route to the room changed every time she stepped into the inn, but that was ridiculous; the building was just poorly designed. Still, she couldn't seem to find her room.

One of the inn's workers appeared from nowhere. All of them seemed to be beautiful women with narrow features and shining black hair. "Good evening, Ise-dono. We've prepared a romantic dinner for you and your husband, as requested."

"What? He's not my husband, he's not even staying here, and I didn't request any romantic dinner—"

"Don't be rude, Nanao-chan." He was next to her again, his haori sliding against her arm. Her Captain pressed a hand to her back, walking with her into the room the worker indicated.

"There's clearly been a mistake," Nanao said, but the worker only smiled and closed the screen behind her. "Did you do this, Captain?"

"No, I didn't. But you were going to eat dinner, and so was I, so why not enjoy the food that's already been prepared?"

She stepped away from his hand. His argument was reasonable, and she couldn't find a way to refuse without rudeness, though she still felt suspicious of the whole thing. "Very well."

She sat and began to eat, watching him. He sat with a flourish and ate with enthusiasm. But she knew him too well to be fooled. As she'd anticipated, he couldn't resist an interrogation. It was cheerful and well-disguised, but she recognized it immediately. "I was so happy when I heard my Nanao-chan was taking a vacation. How long have I been trying to get you to go away to the Lake District in the west?"

"You have been trying to get me to go away _with you_ to the Lake District for many years." She sipped her tea.

"My family has a home in a particularly lovely spot. I think you'd like it there." He smiled, but his eyes were sharp.

"It's inappropriate for your subordinates to vacation at your family's home."

"But my Nanao-chan is so much more than my subordinate. And staying with my family isn't inappropriate, if it's right for our relationship."

"Most of our relationship is inappropriate," she said, intending to chide him, but a note of sadness crept into her voice instead.

"That depends entirely on what the nature of our relationship is, Nanao-chan." His eyes were gentler now.

She sighed. She did not want to discuss their relationship; that was a conversation she'd been dreading since the silence had grown between them when Lisa reentered their lives. She'd always been confident of her place as the Vice Captain of the Eighth, and for the first time she'd felt fear that she'd be replaced when the Vizards were offered a pardon and some of them resumed their old positions. Nanao was an excellent Vice Captain, she knew that; but Lisa had held the position before her, for much longer.

Nanao had always been comfortable with the slow progression of her relationship with her Captain. But Lisa had been intimate with Captain Kyōraku, something Nanao had suspected before, and Lisa had confirmed during conversation with a bluntness that made Nanao wince. Lisa had already had everything that Nanao wanted, and Lisa could easily take it back again. Nanao's confidence and comfort with her place in the world were shaken by Lisa's reappearance.

"And no matter how inappropriate it may be, I have to proclaim my love for Nanao-chan. If you'll remember last Valentine's Day—"

"Don't bring up the Valentine's Day Incident," she said, but she was grateful he'd moved them away from the dangerous waters they'd been swimming in. It was true that most of the closeness she'd allowed him was not something that truly belonged to a Captain and Vice Captain relationship; she very much doubted that Captain Kuchiki, for instance, had ever serenaded Renji from a balcony, or that Renji had ever needed to smack Captain Kuchiki in the face with a book for inappropriate contact during budget meetings.

And the Valentine's Day Incident—surely Renji would never have set Captain Kuchiki's office on fire with Hadō 31 during that frivolous Living World holiday, and if he had, Captain Kuchiki would likely have cut him into very small pieces.

Certainly he wouldn't have done what Captain Kyōraku had: walking around for weeks proclaiming, "The love between Nanao-chan and I burns so hot, we lost most of the office to it last week!"

"If you have a burning sensation, I would suggest a visit to the Fourth Division. They have treatments for that sort of thing," she'd hissed at him, though she'd eventually given up hope that he would stop discussing the Valentine's Day Incident, as it had come to be known in Seireitei.

She shook her head at the memory.

"What is it, Nanao-chan?"

She laughed a little. "I can't imagine Captain Kuchiki and Renji-kun having an incident like that one."

"Maybe you'd be surprised, Nanao-chan." He grinned wickedly.

"What? Really?" She leaned over the table.

"What people do in their private time is their own business. This is an unexpected interest in gossip, naughty Nanao-chan," he murmured, leaning in toward her.

"Think of the photo book sales that the SWA could get with romantic photos of them." Their lips were only whispers apart. He smelled good, like pine trees and spice and home. But he was home, wasn't he? She'd missed it, and missed him.

"I don't think you'd ever get them to agree. But the basic idea is excellent. Perhaps if you tried it with different targets."

"Different targets? Would you do something like that?" His eyes were on her mouth, and her tongue darted out to wet her lips.

"I could be persuaded. If Nanao-chan directed the shoot, took the photos, and provided motivation for me." He drew closer.

"Motivation?" Her eyelids slipped half-closed.

"Yes. You know how unmotivated I can be. You'd really have to apply yourself to me, Nanao-chan."

"I can be very diligent," she whispered. His hand brushed her cheek as he had when he'd given her the hair ornament. She wanted to kiss him. She craved the contact with him, the intimacy that would build a path over the deep silence between them. This was easy, physical attraction. They wanted each other; it was obvious. But she wanted so much more with him than that.

If she kissed him now, it would hurt so much more when they had the conversation about the silence between them. He was attracted to her, she was certain of that much. But her conversations with Lisa had made it painfully apparent to Nanao that his feelings for her were not a unique romantic love that would end in roses and forever.

When they did have to talk about the silence between them, it would be more than humiliating for her. Not only would he decline her love for him, but he would do it gently, carefully, which was utterly unbearable. He did have feelings for her and perhaps even loved her, just not in the way that she desired.

She pulled back from him, from the lingering desire between them, from his warmth. "I'm going to my room. Good night, Captain."

His eyes were watchful. "I'll walk you. I need to see about getting a room."

"You're staying?"

He smiled. "It's quite late now, isn't it? Staying the night seems like the best thing to do."

"I'm sure it won't be a problem for you to get a room. There are very few guests here at this time of year." She slid the door open. "What?"

Guests and inn workers swarmed the halls. Nanao stopped one of the inn's workers. "What's going on here?"

"Oh, we're very busy now, Ise-dono. Many guests have unexpectedly arrived." The woman smiled, her high cheekbones prominent in her face.

"I needed to get a second room, for my—" She gestured over her shoulder at Captain Kyōraku.

"You have such a handsome husband, Ise-dono! How wonderful!"

Another woman from the inn stepped over. "I'm sorry to say, there are no more rooms. We have so many guests."

"So many," the narrow-faced woman said.

"But you misunderstand. He's not my husband, he's my Captain." Nanao gave Captain Kyōraku a stern look, but he did not intervene.

"Oh, you're so lucky, Ise-dono!" The women tittered behind their hands.

"Listen, please, we really need some accommodation here. Can we please at least get a screen and additional bedding?"

"We'll try!" The women darted off through the hall, ducking into different rooms.

Nanao rubbed at her temples. "I do not feel confident that we will receive a screen or more bedding. It's very strange that they've gotten so busy, isn't it?"

"Don't worry sharing about the room, Nanao-chan."

"It's inappropriate," she said. She was annoyed that she would not get a reprieve from his presence. She could demand that he leave the resort, but that would probably plunge them into the conversation he'd likely come out here to have, and she most definitely did not want that talk now.

"We've slept together in more intimate scenarios than this." He followed her to her room.

"Battlefields and training don't count. Those are professional situations." She looked around her room for some solution, but the furniture was sparse. Her Captain would likely appreciate the lovely trees painted on the walls, though. "We'll make it work, I suppose. Could you please wait outside?"

"Of course, lovely Nanao-chan." He stepped out of the room.

She prepared for bed and then sat on the large futon, which could easily fit two people, even if one of them was as large as Captain Kyōraku. "You can come in, Captain."

He reentered the room, and when he saw her on the bed with her hair down, something lit in his eyes. She adjusted her glasses, uncomfortable. "I am prepared to offer you two concessions."

"I'm interested." She had the distinct impression he was interested in a number of things, none of which she intended to give him.

"You can have this pillow, and one of the blankets. In return, you will do nothing inappropriate, and you will not stare at me while I sleep." She forced herself to hold his gaze as she laid out her requests. She held out the pillow.

He accepted it from her hand. "You know, Nanao-chan, the idea is not for me to take advantage of you, but for you to take advantage of me. It's much more fun that way." He winked.

"You sound like you're already dreaming." He took the pillow and stretched out on the floor a few steps from the bed. "Will that be comfortable?"

"I can sleep anywhere, my considerate Nanao-chan. It's a skill I've developed."

"You've certainly had years of practice," she said, thinking of the various odd spots she'd found him relaxing: in fields and parks, on roofs and porches, and once on top of a bookcase in the library. She turned out the light. "You'll leave tomorrow?" she asked, her anxiety creeping higher.

"That's for tomorrow, isn't it? Good night, Nanao-chan."

She removed her glasses and lay down on her side, facing away from him. "Good night, Captain."

* * *

Nanao stared at the ceiling, abandoning any pretense of sleeping. Captain Kyōraku's breathing was deep and even across the room. Having him here made the room seem small and intimate although it was quite spacious. She pushed back the covers and rose quietly from bed, grabbing a haori and leaving the room.

Nanao stepped out into the garden behind the inn, the moon bright overhead. Water flowed in a thin stream beside the path. She found a bench in an open area with a few flowers scenting the air, even at night.

A sound on the path brought her eyes to Chiyo, who looked surprised but not displeased to see her. 'Are you also a nocturnal creature, Ise-san?"

"No, I'm not really. I generally go to bed at a reasonable time and get up rather early. My Captain is the nocturnal creature."

Chiyo nodded and shifted slowly toward the bench, sitting beside Nanao. "He's a charming and handsome man, your Captain."

"Yes, he is," Nanao said. Ordinarily she would have denied noticing any such qualities in him, but she couldn't see the point of the lie now.

"He's the man you love, isn't he?" When Nanao's eyes closed Chiyo hurried on. "Please forgive me if I've caused offense, but your feelings seemed so clear earlier, when he gave you the hair comb. Please forget that I mentioned anything."

Nanao's eyes opened. 'No, it's fine." She smiled faintly. "You are not the first person to tell me my feelings are too obvious recently." And Lisa had been much less apologetic about it.

"Oh, I see. You've confessed to Kyōraku-kun? I don't mean to pry. It's only that you seem so sad. It pains me to see such a weight on a young woman. I've had many daughters and now granddaughters of my own, so I have a good amount of experience in matters like these."

The warmth and concern in her voice felt genuine to Nanao. "You're very kind, Chiyo-san. I have not confessed anything to Captain Kyōraku. But—he's a very perceptive man, and as you said, my feelings are not particularly well-concealed."

"And he hasn't said anything to you?" The sympathy in Chiyo's voice made Nanao's eyes sting; if it was difficult to hear pity in an old woman's voice, how painful would it be to hear it from Captain Kyōraku?

"No."

Chiyo was silent for a minute, and Nanao stared at the moon, round and heavy. It was the kind of moon he liked, the kind he'd pulled her out of bed to come and see with him before. They wouldn't be able to do things like that after this trip, she was certain. How could she bear to sit on a roof beside him, listening to him talk about the stars, when she could hardly bear to be in the same room with him?

She might not even be able to bear being in the same division with him.

"Are you so sure that he would not react favorably to a confession? Men can be denser than you'd imagine. He's obviously attracted to you and fond of you. Perhaps you could have something more in your relationship than you think."

Nanao was a bit surprised at how off-handedly Chiyo insulted all men again. "It's inaccurate to say men are dense like that. And Captain Kyōraku in particular is not dense. He's very, very clever. Maybe he would react well to something like that. He's a romantic man. But the gap what more he would offer to me and what more I would want is too large. It would not be fair of me to expect so much from him."

"Fair?" Chiyo scoffed. "What does fair matter in love? So he's a man that likes women, that's clear. But is it really so much to ask him not to chase other vixens? You told me not to call him dense, but which of us is underestimating him here? You would not even consider pursuing him, because it would be too much to ask him to stay true to you. That is a very low expectation, in my opinion."

Nanao's lips pressed together, and when she spoke, her words were clipped. "I have it on the best authority that he has not had the kind of exclusive, serious relationship that I would want with anyone successfully in the last two thousand years. That is the fact of the matter. It has nothing to do with underestimating him, or setting low expectations. It's about his history."

"Of course he hasn't succeeded," Chiyo said, smacking her knee.

"What?" Nanao asked, startled.

"If he'd succeeded, he wouldn't be available for you to pursue at all, would he? He'd be in a relationship with someone else, or he'd be widowed, which isn't the case."

"What is your point?" Nanao's eyes narrowed.

"Someone has to take that risk on him. Why shouldn't it be you?" Chiyo smiled.

"The risk is too great. I'm not comfortable taking a risk like that." The potential for Nanao to be hurt was just too high.

Chiyo sighed. "Do you really think you'll be less hurt if you don't pursue something with him than you will be if he has the relationship you want with someone else?"

"I don't know," she said, but thought of the jealousy she'd felt when he went to see Lisa without her.

Chiyo chuckled. "That's difficult, isn't it? If you're in a situation where not acting doesn't spare you anything, why not act?"

"This risk is too great." Nanao's hands fidgeted and she clutched them together in her lap.

"It's disappointing to hear such caution from someone so young. Listen, you can be cautious when you're old and a misstep could break your hip. But when you're young, you should take risks. Time will ease the hurt of bad experiences, and the memories will warm you in your fading years," Chiyo said.

"I don't know." Nanao looked up at the moon.

"Well, if you're set on being cautious, there's always the ribbon Misao-chan tried to give you earlier. If you used that, then you could be certain you'd get a positive response to your confession. The effects would likely only last a few weeks or months, but by then, he'd already be accustomed to being in a relationship with you, and would probably never even notice the effect of the ribbon had worn off. That's a very common outcome, in my experience."

"That's—" _tempting._ "That's unethical."

"It's a small thing, a small spell. Any lasting relationship would be to your credit, not the credit of the ribbon." Chiyo smiled.

Nanao shook her head.

"Well, I hope that you reconsider. Or at least make some memories on this trip, hmm? This area is famous for its romantic settings," Chiyo said.

"He'd like this spot." Nanao glanced at the moon, the flowers in the night garden, and stream running nearby.

"You should be enjoying the garden with Kyōraku-kun, and not with an old lady like me." Chiyo rose, patting Nanao's hand. "You remind me of one of my daughters. She had such anxiety over everything."

"A healthy amount of worry is perfectly normal," Nanao said, but without any weight behind the words. "How is your daughter now?"

"Oh, she's doing very well. I made sure of that. All of my attention is focused on Misao-chan now." The old woman laughed as she turned down the garden path. "Have a good night, Ise-san. Or should I say, have a memorable one?" Chiyo's laughter floated back to Nanao on the bench.

"Good night, Chiyo-san," Nanao murmured, rising from the bench.

She walked slowly back to the room, making her way through the winding corridors of the large inn. For all that the inn workers had said the inn was busy, she saw and heard no one. Perhaps it was just very late. At the door to her room she paused before entering. She made her way back to her bed, collapsing on it.

"Nanao-chan?" Captain Kyōraku's voice was low.

"I was outside." She lay on her side, facing him, but with her eyes closed.

"Is it a beautiful night?"

"You should go and look, if you're awake anyway. It's warm enough outside, and the moon is full and low. You always like that kind of moon," she said, opening her eyes a crack.

He was watching her face with his head propped on his hand, supported by his elbow. "Pregnant."

"What?" she asked, surprised by the word.

"On nights when the moon is low and full, she looks pregnant." He sat up, stretching his arms over his head. "Will you go and enjoy the night with me, Nanao-chan?"

She rolled to her back, staring at the ceiling for a few moments. "I don't want to talk," she said, but gave no reason.

"We won't talk. We'll just take in the atmosphere of the night." He stood and stalked to the bed, reaching his hand out to her.

She ignored his hand and slipped off the bed, standing. "There's a garden."

"Wonderful. Lead the way, sweet Nanao-chan." If he felt slighted she hadn't accepted his hand, he didn't show it.

They passed through the still corridors Nanao had just traveled, arriving at the garden path and the bench without any further discussion. She sat near one end of the bench, leaving him plenty of room, but he still sat close enough to her for his thigh to brush hers. She didn't complain; it would take too much effort to get him to move over, and she liked to feel his warmth seeping into her through their clothes.

"Lovely," he said, gazing at the moon.

She said nothing. Time passed around them; she was aware of it but not concerned with it. She enjoyed being with him like this, with the night surrounding them and no one else nearby. If they didn't speak it was possible to pretend that things between them were the same as they'd always been.

But that was not the truth.

"Good night, Captain." She stood, turning to the path back to the inn.

"Nanao-chan," he said, clasping his fingers loosely around her wrist.

"What is it?" she asked, frozen.

"Thank you." His fingers slid down to her hand, squeezing briefly before he let her go.

She was still for a moment. Did the silence between them bother him the way it bothered her? Did he miss her as she missed him? What did any of that matter, when what he might offer her was so far from what she wanted? But still—her head tipped in a bare nod, and then she hurried down the path, back to the room.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Summary: Nanao's vacation takes an unexpected turn when Captain Kyōraku follows her to the Fourteenth District.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Contains: Spoilers for the Lost Substitute Shinigami Arc, consensual adult activity in later chapters.
> 
> I tried to work some of my slots on [my fanbingo card](http://pics.livejournal.com/r_dahlia/pic/00001qyz) into this story. Fanbingo is a [community at Dreamwidth.](http://fanbingo.dreamwidth.org/) This is chapter two of five; this story will be around thirty thousand words total.

Nanao floated on the surface of the small lake, drifting with the slight current. The sun was warm on her face, and she felt drowsy, but not peaceful. She hadn't slept well after she'd returned to the room. Her Captain had come back in shortly after she did, but she'd feigned the sleep she couldn't reach. Just knowing he was there had pushed away any chance of rest.

How could she stay in the Eighth Division when even being in the same room with him filled her with anxiety? Anxiety over what Lisa might have told him, anxiety over the gentle rejection he'd give her, anxiety over the temptation she felt to ignore the other problems in favor of snatching whatever intimacy she might be able to have with him, however brief.

This was not a relaxing getaway, but how could it be, when the source of her trouble had followed her to the Fourteenth District? It was a mistake to come out here, if he was just going to follow her. She could have been getting work done at the Eighth. There was movement in the water near her, and she sighed. "Shouldn't you be in the Living World, Captain?"

"I was in the Living World. I saw our friends there, and I enjoyed it," Captain Kyōraku said.

She kept her eyes closed, still floating, her brow furrowed. "Then why aren't you still there?"

"Because I promised my Nanao-chan that I would be back soon, and I was, in less than a day. Imagine my surprise when Enjōji-kun told me you'd taken an unplanned vacation to parts unknown. Alone."

"I am entitled to free time, and I may spend it as I see fit. If I want to be alone, I can be alone."

"Did you want to be alone, Nanao-chan?" he asked, and the question was much too dangerous to answer.

She shifted the conversation to less treacherous territory. Her eyes opened when she spoke. "Do you know what a vacation is, Captain?"

"It's a magical time when lovely Nanao-chan relaxes in a lake wearing the most delicious bikini. Is that pink?" He was swimming near her, a wide grin on his face. The sun glinted off the water on his tanned skin, and she swallowed. Hopefully he was wearing something on his lower half. It was a distinct possibility that he was wearing nothing at all. She closed her eyes and tried to push the image out of her mind.

"It could be called pink, although that would lack precision." She'd sounded more combative than she'd intended, but she was tired and hadn't wanted to see him so soon.

"If you want me to be more specific, I'll need a closer look."

She opened her eyes when she felt his hand brush her back. He was swimming very close to her, his eyes focused on her bikini top. "What are you doing?" she snapped.

"I'm trying to find a better description of the color for you, since you found 'pink' inadequate. My Nanao-chan should never have to settle for anything inadequate."

"Stop staring at my chest." She flicked a spray of water at his face, scowling.

"That's mean, Nanao-chan!" He playfully scooped water into his hands and splashed it on her chest.

"Don't you dare," she said, her eyes narrowing. She was not in the mood to play with him.

He grinned and shrugged, but one of his hands disappeared into the water suspiciously. "Would you call it cherry?"

"No." She flipped out of her floating posture and brought her arm up to block the water he splashed at her. She returned the volley immediately, whipping water at his face.

"Pink like the sunrise?" He circled her, splashing water at her back.

"No." She hit him with a backhanded wave of water.

"Watermelon? Cherry blossom? Rose? You'll have to help me; I'm running out of pink words." He splashed her again, and she'd had more than enough of that.

"Absolutely not." She pushed him, trying to sink him into the water.

He resisted and grabbed her waist with both hands. "Breathe," he murmured, and pulled her under with him.

Surprised, her hands grabbed onto his shoulders. The water felt cooler without the sun on her skin. But his hands were warm and his touch sent sparks through her body. He brought them back up to the surface after a few seconds. Nanao's hair fell across her eyes, the tie lost to the water. At least her glasses were safely on the shore.

She took her hands off him to push her hair back, dunking it under the water until she could smooth it back neatly. "Why did you do that?"

"You seemed hot, Nanao-chan." He grinned and it struck a raw part of her heart. He was so attractive like this, his eyes teasing and narrowed against the sun, his muscles hard against the softness of the water, his lips wet and full against the straight lines of his teeth. She wondered how soft those lips would be if she kissed him.

She swam away from the hands around her waist. "It's your fault," she said, angrier than she'd meant to sound.

"I like to make Nanao-chan hot. But I wish it wasn't anger so much. What did I do that made you so angry with me, Nanao-chan?" He caressed her cheek, and she batted him away.

You made me fall in love with you. But that wasn't his fault, just as it wasn't his fault that he didn't love her in the way that she wanted. Her anger deflated, like the air in a leaking balloon. "Nothing. You haven't done anything."

"I'm sure that's not true. I've always done something." He smiled, and because he was trying to cheer her, she smiled back. It was just a small lift of her lips, but his smile widened in response.

Her heart flinched; it hurt to be close to him, but she didn't want him to leave, either. She was hungry for whatever pieces of him she could have. "You did follow me on my vacation. That is completely inappropriate." She sniffed.

He laughed. "The image of Nanao-chan relaxing and wearing vacation clothes was too much of a temptation. How could I resist?"

She sighed and started floating again, letting the current move her. "At least the scenery is nice."

"Everything I see is beautiful," he said, and she closed her eyes. If she looked at him now, she was sure he would see too much.

After several quiet minutes a thought occurred to her. "How did you know where I was?" She'd left long before he'd woken up.

"Have you noticed how marvelously helpful the people are in this District? No fewer than three of the ladies at the inn offered me directions, maps, and a picnic lunch for me to enjoy with 'my wife.' Wasn't that kind of them?"

She shifted from floating to treading water so that she could see his face. "They didn't! I was most explicit with them this morning that you are not my husband, and that I am vacationing alone."

"Don't scowl like that, sweetheart. I'm sure it was just an innocent mistake." He was too handsome, happy in the summer sun, with the landscape blurred behind him and the water caressing his skin.

"Don't call me that. Do you really think it's just a mistake? This is at least three times you've been addressed as my husband by these local women. They all look somewhat similar, too—"

"There's some resemblance; they're fox-faced, some more than others, but I assume there is at least some distant relation between them. It's not unusual for particular features to become common in a region, especially an isolated one. "

"Of course, but—I don't know, all of these beautiful women, all of the fox symbolism in the area, and there was Chiyo-san—" she stopped, unwilling to tell him about the love spell.

"If you're suggesting that the innkeepers are kitsunes making mischief, I'm delighted that you'd let your imagination free like that, but truthfully I think it's more likely that they have poor memories or romantic streaks. But what about Chiyo-san?" His leg brushed against hers.

"Chiyo-san sells rare novelties and objects." But it wasn't as if the old woman was actually selling working love spells; Nanao didn't believe in the existence of such things. She shook her head. "I'm sure you're right, the innkeepers are just trying to be helpful to tourists."

"I'm very grateful to them right now." His voice had dipped. Her hand brushed his chest, and she realized they'd been drifting closer to each other.

"Why?"

"Because I've gotten to see my Nanao-chan wearing a bikini and relaxing, both of which are very rare things. When did you get this swimsuit, Nanao-chan?"

She licked her lips. "It's not new. I bought it for the SWA's trip to the beach."

"I still regret not sneaking along on that trip. Is this the bikini top that you lost in the ocean?" Their legs were touching with every movement Nanao made. This was a bad idea, she knew that; but he was so magnetic. She'd tried to stay away from him, but he'd followed her.

"That trip was for SWA members and their female guests only. You would not have been welcome."

"No?" His hand brushed against her ribcage, as if by accident, but her breath caught.

"This is the same swimsuit. It has a weak clasp, which led to that unfortunate incident." He was very close now, much too close. Her breasts rubbed against his chest and her hands moved to his shoulders of their own accord.

"Does it?" His hand shifted to her back, two of his fingers touching the clasp.

"Yes. If you just put a little pressure on it in the right direction, it pops open." Her hands came together behind his neck. The temptation to kiss him was overwhelming. Her love might be unrequited, but lust—she could feel his desire for her, brushing against her hip—he shared that with her. She could have this part of him, at least. If it was going to be impossible for her to stay in the Eighth Division anyway, why shouldn't she have this memory?

The clasp opened under his fingers. Her top drifted on the water, still attached by the clasp at her neck. His eyes darkened. "Nanao-chan."

She pressed her lips against his, the desire of years rising within her. He returned her kiss, his tongue slipping into her mouth. She welcomed it, welcomed him. Her legs wrapped around his waist. They were still in the water, but she didn't care. He was strong enough for both of them, and she wanted to feel him.

One of his hands gripped her bottom, holding her tighter against him. She moaned into his mouth at the sensation. He was wearing a fundoshi; she could feel it against her thighs. "Nanao—"

"More," she said, biting his lip.

He groaned. She kissed him aggressively, her tongue dueling with his, her mouth demanding more. He matched her intensity, and she thought they might have swollen lips later, but she couldn't be gentle; she wanted to feel everything, wanted to leave her mark on him.

Nanao slid down on his body and realized that he walking them out of the water. She pulled herself up higher, her legs tightening around him. A flash of pleasure sparked through her. She rocked on him in a little pattern that made her nails bite into his back. Both of his hands held her against him, and she made a pleased noise against his mouth.

They were out of the water now, and he laid her down on a blanket that had been set for the picnic he'd mentioned earlier. He held himself over her, resisting her efforts to pull him down. "Nanao-chan."

"Come here," she whispered, arching her back. His eyes were drawn to her breasts, still beaded with water, glistening in the sun.

"There's no rush, is there?"

She arched her back again and he bent his head to her breasts, licking and teasing. He kissed his way back up to her mouth soon, devouring, hungry for her, as she was hungry for him. Her legs wrapped around his back, seeking to bring him closer.

"Nanao-chan, we should slow down."

She shook her head. Why should they go slowly, when she was already melting and aching for him? He resisted her pulling, and her eyes narrowed. With a swift movement of her arms and legs she flipped him on his back, sitting astride him with a small smile.

He laughed, low and deep. She stretched her arms over her head, and his hands clamped down on her hips, hard. He swallowed. "We should slow down."

"Why?" She leaned forward, balancing herself with one hand on his chest. Her other hand drifted back to his fundoshi, her small fingers gathering the fabric and moving it to one side. Her hand wrapped around him, and he groaned.

"That's good, but—we have to talk before we do this, sweetheart."

"We can talk later." She stroked him experimentally. Her hand came off his chest to clasp one of his, shifting it to her bikini bottom.

His fingers hooked into the pink fabric, tugging it down, but he stopped. "We can't do this without talking first, Nanao."

"Yes, we can." She wiggled a little further out of her bikini. "Please?" He groaned and she leaned down to kiss him, asking again without words. He kissed her with an urgency that left her with no doubt that he felt the same hunger for her that she felt for him.

His eyes closed, his brows drawn together. "No, Nanao." His eyes opened, and the firmness of his resolve surprised her.

She froze, uncertain. "You don't want this—you don't want me?"

"Of course I want you. You can measure my desire with your hand." His voice was low and a little teasing.

She licked her lips. "Then why—"

"I want to make sure that it's clear to both of us where our relationship stands before we do this. I don't want there to be any misunderstandings between us."

She reeled back. He couldn't wait to reject her love; he wanted to do it now, before they'd even been intimate. Heat rushed to her face. She stood, slapping his hands away from her body. "You couldn't have at least waited an hour?" she hissed, retrieving her forgotten bikini top from the blanket and throwing it on.

"I'm trying to be considerate of your feelings—"

"Shut up." That was worse. He was compassionate and considerate, and he wouldn't want her to suffer any punctured illusions about what could be between them, or any regrets about sleeping with him when he wasn't in love with her.

Humiliation and anger burned through her body. She found her glasses and her cover-up, brushing her fingers through her hair roughly. He'd righted his fundoshi and stood. "Nanao-chan, please listen to me."

"Why did you have to ruin it?" Her eyes began to fill with hot tears. "Leave me alone." She left the lake with a fast step into shunpo, arriving at the inn and going to her room without stopping to speak with anyone. Her eyes wouldn't clear, no matter how much she blinked. She began to pack her things, throwing them carelessly into a bag.

There was another bag still at the lake, with a book and a few other things in it, but she'd write that off as a loss; it was better than facing the possibility of returning to the lake, where she'd been so rejected.

The hair comb he'd bought for her slowed her rapid packing. She carefully tucked it into some clothes, hoping to avoid any damage. She also paused when she saw the wrapped fox sake set. It was truly a present for him—she'd been interested in it because she thought he might like it. She carried it to the bag her Captain had brought with him, quibbling for a second before opening it. His clothes were packed with less neatness than hers, but it wasn't as careless as she might have expected.

She shifted his things to make room for the sake set, but froze when the door opened. Captain Kyōraku stepped in, thankfully dressed in a kosode and hakama, carrying her bag and the picnic blanket. He set them on the floor.

There were a few moments of silence before he spoke. "It's kind of Nanao-chan to pack for me."

She stood, cradling the sake set. "I'm leaving."

He walked over to her, bringing his hands to her shoulders. "Nanao-chan, we need to talk." His voice was gentle, but she stumbled back as though his touch burned.

"I don't want to talk to you right now."

"What happened at the lake—"

"No. Let's just forget what happened earlier." She stared at the sake set.

"Even if we did forget that we nearly made love at the lake, we'd still need to talk."

She shook her head. "I can't."

"I know that it's difficult for you, but it's not easy for me, either. Please, can you try?" His eyes were tender and his voice soothing.

She was struck again by how much he cared about her, and that made the pain in her heart worse, because she couldn't hate him, not when he was trying to be as gentle as possible. Her eyes closed. "No. Not now." She opened her eyes and met his concerned gaze squarely. "Here, take this. It's for you." She shoved the wrapped sake set at him and fled out the door.

An inn worker greeted her. "Hello, Ise-dono. How may I serve you and your husband today?"

"He's not my husband. Please let him have the room for the duration of my booking. And if there is any luggage remaining, please have it shipped to my address in Seireitei."

"Certainly, Ise-dono. Will you not be joining your husband for the rest of your vacation?" Her close-set eyes twinkled, her smile bright.

"My vacation is over," she said, hurrying out of the inn and away from the fox-faced woman.

* * *

After a few steps of shunpo she stopped at a roadside shrine with a fox statue inside. The forest was quiet here, the sun dappling a pattern on the restrained flowers of her beach cover-up.

She would have to leave the Eighth Division.

A denial rose immediately in her throat. The Eighth was her home. How could she leave it after so many years? How could she leave him?

After the Winter War, when she'd gone to the battlefield and seen him with those terrible wounds, her chest had been torn open and her heart exposed and raw. He could have died; he nearly had. He was a Captain, and it was his duty to put his life in danger to protect others. She'd sat at his side in the hospital and ached for him, for the realities she could not change, and the dreams she could not make reality.

She hadn't been able to wrap her heart back in protective bone. She was still open, and it hurt. It hurt when Lisa told her that Nanao could not have the kind of relationship with Captain Kyōraku that she wanted; it hurt each time he was close and she could not touch him; it hurt when she'd touched him at the lake and he'd refused her.

This trip was intended to give her time away from him, to see if she could tuck her heart away and things could go on as they had been. But the static nature of their relationship was gone; instead she was faced with a shifting puzzle that she didn't understand.

She would have to leave the Eighth Division.

She rose, nodding. Staying was likely impossible, although leaving seemed just as difficult. She took one flash step and then several more, intending to reach the rim of the District and straighten her appearance before approaching the gate to Seireitei. Her clothes had not been high on her priorities list back at the inn, and she tugged on the hem of her beach cover-up as she left shunpo. It was really too short to be worn anywhere but the beach and—

That shrine looked identical to the one she'd just left. She walked over for a closer look, bending at the waist to study the statue. It was the same shrine. But she'd taken flash steps that should have put her miles away.

"You seem really interested in the fox symbolism in this area, Nanao-chan."

She turned her head to see Captain Kyōraku leaning against a tree, his eyes riveted to the area exposed by the cover-up's inadequacy. Nanao straightened immediately. "Don't stare," she snapped.

"It's very hard to resist at the moment. Have I told you how much I love your beach clothes?"

She sighed, drawing on her reserves of patience. He'd followed her; of course he'd followed her. "This isn't a good time for that. Something strange is going on." She studied the sky, the trees, and the ground, frowning.

"I know that things between us have been different—strange—since Lisa came back into our lives." He affected a casual tone, but his eyes were sharp when she glanced at him.

"Strange is the wrong word for what's between us. More importantly, have you been here before? Is this spot familiar to you?"

"What word would you use to describe what's between us?"

"Answer my question, please." She crouched to touch the earth, but it felt ordinary.

"If you answer mine." At her nod he said, "No, I've never been here before. This place is wholly unfamiliar. What word would you use for what's between us?"

""Difficult. Treacherous." She rose and stepped toward him. "We'll have to do a test."

"Treacherous? Do you find our situation dangerous, or do you think that I'll betray you?"

"We need to take a few flash steps. I think it would be best if we stayed together."

He stayed where he was, even when her foot started tapping and she waved at him impatiently. "Tell me first, Nanao-chan."

"You could at least pretend an interest in our situation." She scowled at him.

"I'm aware that our situation in this place is bothering you. But right now the situation between us is more important to me than our external situation. So please, tell me first."

"After this, we will flash step together." He nodded. "What's between us is dangerous, not because you would betray me. But we have very different things that we value and are true to, and it's not—it's not wise for us to pursue a closer relationship. Now, can we go, please?"

He left his lounging position, coming to tower over her. "You must know that I value you beyond words, Nanao-chan. If you know that, you could trust me to be true to you."

"You would be true to me in your own way. But we have different definitions of what it means to be true to someone." She rubbed at her sternum, as if that could ease the terrible tightness in her chest.

"Tell me your definition, and I'll tell you that I can meet it." He cupped her cheek, his thumb stroking her skin.

For one moment her heart filled with hope. She was sure it showed in her eyes, because he leaned in, his hand cradling one of hers. He might try to be true to her, to give her the kind of exclusive, serious relationship she craved with him. But was it really fair of her to ask him to pretzel himself to fit the demands of her heart? And if he did it, how long would it be before his unhappiness at the constraints overwhelmed his happiness to have finally won Nanao?

She remembered Lisa's warning: Trust his actions, not his words. He loves romantic ideas, but it's just dressing for the same carousel of one-night stands and crap relationships most people have. Maybe he is capable of more, but if he hasn't shown it in the last two thousand years, do you want to take that risk? Bottom line, he's a bad bet for you, Nanao-chan.

Those words had stung Nanao then, delivered in Lisa's matter-of-fact way; they'd stung more when she'd seen affection and pity in Lisa's eyes. Lisa wasn't being catty or cruel. She was trying to be kind to Nanao, and spare her more pain in the future.

"No," she said, and the word echoed like a bell into the silence between them, digging the chasm deeper.

"Nanao-chan, what is it? If this is about Lisa-chan, I can explain that."

She took a step away, his hand dropping from her face. "You don't owe me any explanations. I am your Vice Captain, not your wife." She flinched when the words came out. Why did she say that? It must be all of the women from the inn repeating over and over, your wife, your husband, to the two of them; it had gotten trapped in her throat and escaped just now.

A silence fell between them and she studied the packed earth of the trail. Their hands were still joined and she flexed her fingers once, to see if he'd let go. His hand tightened around hers, which surprised her, so she glanced up. There was an odd expression on his face, something she hadn't seen often. He looked very solemn, but his eyes were light—that was strange, because he ordinarily looked happy and had serious eyes.

"Nanao-chan."

She swallowed, but didn't speak.

"My lovely, precious Nanao-chan." He closed the space between them.

"We should go. We need to try our shunpo, it's very important—"

He kissed her.

She sank into the moment, into the kiss, before she remembered that she was trying to distance herself from him, that this was a very bad idea, and that the outcome of a kiss had been disastrous at the lake. "Stop," she whispered, pulling her lips away from his. "We can't do this. You can't play with me like this."

"Who's playing?" he asked, seeking her lips again.

She shoved him away with both hands on his chest. "You are. You're always playing, and that's fine most of the time, but it's not now."

"I want you to take me seriously, Nanao-chan." He held her hands against his chest.

"Then be serious," she hissed. "I believe we're in a serious situation here, so if you could pay at least some attention to that, I would appreciate it."

"Don't look so worried, sweetheart. We'll figure this out."

It wasn't clear to her whether he was talking about the shunpo problem or about the two of them, and Nanao didn't ask, since he shifted to her side, wrapping an arm around her waist. "Holding hands would have been adequate for the purpose of the test, Captain."

"But you said that it's important for us to stay together, Nanao-chan."

She sighed for his benefit, which made him smile and tighten his hold. It felt good to be close to him—his body was firm against hers and he radiated warmth. "Let's go."

He flash stepped with a speed that had her gasping. She grabbed his shoulder with one hand and a fistful of his haori with the other. After several steps he stopped easily. "We should be at the gate to Seireitei."

The fox statue at the roadside shrine leered at her. She scowled at it.

"Yare, yare. Nanao-chan, I think our vacation might be a bit longer than expected."

"This is my vacation, not our vacation. I can't believe this is happening. Let's try another direction." She shifted to his front so that she could grip his shoulders more tightly. Risking accidental separation during shunpo would be foolish in these questionable circumstances. That was why she wanted to be closer to him; it had nothing to do with the way her senses tingled when she touched him or how comforting she found his scent.

He tightened his hold on her waist and brought his other hand up to stroke the nape of her neck. Captain Kyōraku flash stepped east of their previous course.

The fox statue smiled knowingly at them. "I'm starting to dislike that thing," Nanao said.

"We'll try again." He went west, but again the shrine and the stone fox greeted them. "That statue does look pretty smug, doesn't it?"

"Try the direction where the Laughing Fox Inn is, I have a feeling we'll be able to go that way." Nanao was right; with a few flash steps they easily reached the resort. She groaned and hit her forehead against his chest.

He chuckled.

"It's not funny," she scolded, but without heat. "Let's try to go further in this direction."

A short while later, the smiling fox statue welcomed them back to the shrine.

"It's not a barrier." Nanao's brows drew together in concentration.

"No, it's not. It's more subtle than that. It's almost as though the landscape is reorienting itself around us as we move."

"What should we do, then? If the land itself is shifting around us, I don't know how to counter that."

"With a lot of pins?" He grinned at her.

"Be serious. There must be a kidō or a technique to break this trap. You must know of something we can do."

He raised his eyebrow suggestively. "I know of many things we can do."

"How exactly would anything like that help?" She slapped his drifting hand away from her backside.

"It might help you relax. I just want you to be happier, Nanao-chan. You look so tense and worried."

"And you don't seem to be concerned enough." She stepped away from him, crossing her arms.

"Nanao-chan—" he broke off, turning his head to see up the path. Two beautiful women in swimsuits and transparent cover-ups walked down the trail from the lake toward the shrine at a leisurely pace.

Nanao hadn't sensed them, too focused on him, but he was more alert than she'd given him credit for. Perhaps he was not as casual about the trap they were in as she'd assumed.

"Good afternoon, ladies," Captain Kyōraku called.

"Good afternoon. You must be guests at the Laughing Fox Inn," one of the women said, the other tittering behind her hand. They had the same narrow faces and bright features that characterized all of the women of the district.

"We are. We've just been enjoying the hospitality of this beautiful area." His tone was amiable, but Nanao knew him well enough to see the awareness of his body; at the smallest sign, he could jump into battle.

"We're leaving, actually," Nanao said, watching their faces.

"Leaving so soon? I'm sure you'll change your mind. There's still so much for you to do out here." The women nodded to each other, smiling.

"Is that so? Perhaps one of you lovely ladies has a suggestion on what we might do next?" Captain Kyōraku smiled, but his eyes were sharp.

"Oh, I'm sure the inn is the best place to go. They can inform you of all that the district has to offer," one of the women said.

"We're leaving," Nanao said again.

"Don't be hasty, Nanao-chan, we could go back to the inn and have something to eat and a bit of rest." He stroked his hand down her arm, and the fox-faced women giggled.

She knew why he was touching her; he wanted more information out of this conversation, and she wasn't helping him with that. But she was tired and her temper was fraying. It felt as if the entire district was playing with her, and she hated that.

"Your husband is so considerate—" one of the women said.

"—so charming!" added the other.

"You're so lucky," the first said, and they both nodded.

"He's not my husband," Nanao snapped, and one of the women jumped, surprised. A bright tail popped out over the woman's bikini bottom.

"Have a good day, we'll see you at the inn!" the other woman said, waving, and then both of them hurried off.

Nanao watched their backs until they were out of sight. "Did you see that?"

"When you yelled at them? Yes." Captain Kyōraku rubbed his chin.

"The one that jumped, she had a tail."

"Yes."

"A fox tail."

"Yes."

"They're kitsunes. They really are." She plopped down in the grass by the shrine.

He sat beside her. "That's what it looks like."

Nanao shook her head. They were being played with by fox spirits. Was it just mischief, or something more sinister?

"You know, I always thought that if I met a kitsune they'd use their wiles to seduce me for their own mysterious reasons." He looked a bit wistful, and Nanao made a sound of disdain.

"You're disappointed that they aren't targeting you for seduction?" She narrowed her eyes.

"I didn't say that." He grinned. "Actually, given our encounters with the women of this district so far, I'd say that they're targeting you."

She smacked the brim of his hat. "Don't get such a dreamy look when you say that."

He endeavored to look innocent, as if he hadn't just been obviously fantasizing about Nanao and the fox women. "I don't know what you're talking about, Nanao-chan."

"Liar." The corners of her lips turned up. "My first vacation in years, and I get targeted by kitsunes and trapped in the Fourteenth District."

"At least we're together. It's better than being alone, isn't it?" He held up a corner of his pink haori. "Are you cold, Nanao-chan?"

The wind was a little chilly, but she waved away his offer. She was not going to snuggle up with him. "Alone was the point of this trip." The fox statue was still smiling, and she thought she could hear the giggling of the fox women.

"Alone was the point? Nanao-chan, when I went to the Living World without you, it wasn't because I wouldn't want you along ordinarily, I just needed to see Lisa-chan alone this time. Next time—"

"You don't have to explain yourself to me," she interrupted, hating the gentleness and patience of his voice.

"I want to explain. Things have been changing, and I know that it must have been difficult for you."

"Everything is fine," she said.

He sighed. "We're past the point where we can pretend that, don't you think?"

Her shoulders slumped. "Can't we just go back to the way things were before?" Before the lake, before Lisa's return, before his wounds at Karakura ripped open her heart, even before the Valentine's Day Incident when things had shifted between them—back to when she'd been content, secure in her position as Vice Captain of the Eighth and the comfortable flirtation she and Captain Kyōraku enjoyed. Everything was easier then.

"No."

Her eyes widened. "No?"

"I don't want to go back to that. I want things to change. Nothing can stay the same forever, sweetheart." The weight of his gaze pressed her lids closed.

"You—you weren't happy then?" There was a waver in her voice that she hated for the weakness it exposed.

"I enjoyed our relationship as it was. But I want more. That's natural, isn't it? To want more of something, of someone, that makes you happy?"

She drew her knees up, resting her chin on them. "You want more from me? Like the relationship that you had with Yadōmaru-sempai when she was your Vice Captain?" She caught the subtle flinch that ran over his features from the corner of her eye.

"Nanao-chan, you and Lisa-chan are not the same. You aren't her replacement to me." He rested one large hand on her shoulder.

"Obviously. The two of us are nothing alike beyond our superficial resemblance. You'd have to be an idiot to imagine that we could be exchanged." She adjusted her glasses.

He looked surprised for a moment, and then he laughed. "You're right, Nanao-chan. You and Lisa-chan are not very alike at all. I'm glad that you don't worry about that."

"You didn't answer my question." She removed his hand from her shoulder with two fingers.

"I'm not involved with Lisa-chan, Nanao-chan."

"I didn't ask you that." She could feel the frown on her face.

"But you wanted to know."

She sighed at that. She had wanted to know, and she wouldn't have asked. But he'd avoided the question again. "Do you want a relationship with me like the one you had with Yadōmaru-sempai?"

"I want us to have our own relationship, on our own terms. Lisa-chan has nothing to do with it."

Her chest ached, but she forged ruthlessly ahead. "She was your Vice Captain, and you slept with her. I am your Vice Captain, and you wish to sleep with me. What exactly is the difference?"

"You shouldn't make these kinds of comparisons. The situations have nothing to do with each other." He tried to tip her chin with his fingers to see her face, but she slapped him away.

"What is the difference between the situations? They appear analogous to me."

"Everything about us is different. All of the emotions involved are different." He cupped her cheek, turning her to face him. This time she allowed it. "Believe me, Nanao-chan. You are unique among the women I've known. I could tell you more. I could go on forever, talking about what you are to me, but I think you might run away."

"It isn't as if I'd get far, given the trap we're in." She smiled very slightly. What he'd said was something to consider, to weigh with the words Lisa had given her, and with Nanao's own misgivings about getting involved intimately with him. But although he'd said she was unique, he hadn't offered any specifics about the kind of relationship he wanted with her. There was nothing that signaled that the relationship he wanted was the one that she wanted.

But they did have more urgent issues.

He nodded at her. "The kitsune trap is a problem. I think we should go back to the inn."

"Are you serious?"

"It's the only place that we seem to be able to go freely, and it's the most likely place to find some answers." He stood, rubbing the back of his neck.

"If the kitsunes have malicious intent, going to the inn could be dangerous."

"Yes, but I think the confrontation may be the only solution here. There isn't an obvious barrier or a spell to break."

"I don't want to go back yet. I think we should try to walk to the edge of the allowed area, and see if we can get a handle on whatever the obstacle may be." Nanao stood, stretching her arms over her head before remembering how short the beach cover-up was. When she glanced at her Captain, he was watching her with avid interest.

"We can try that, but let's be prepared to return to the inn, if it comes to that."

She nodded and they began to walk up the path, away from the shrine and the inn.

He fell into an easy stroll beside her. They walked in silence for a long stretch of afternoon, but the forest was unchanging around them. "Let's go back to the inn, Nanao-chan. It'll be night in a few hours. You must be hungry."

She was also exhausted and cold—her sleep had been poor for weeks, and she'd gotten no rest last night—but she said, "No, I want to keep going."

"Then take my haori, at least." He started to remove it from his shoulders.

"I'm fine." She waved away the haori. "No, thank you."

They continued through the gloomy forest. The sky was heavy with gray clouds, and she thought it might storm soon. But she wanted to be back on familiar ground, back at home. It would be easier to deal with the changing planes of her relationship with Captain Kyōraku at home, miles away from any interfering kitsunes.

"Can you think of any reason the kitsunes might target you?"

She thought for a minute. "I can't. If we assume all of the women we've met are kitsunes—"

"I think that's an excellent assumption to start with, Nanao-chan."

"Then I don't see why they'd want to harm us or trap us. I helped Chiyo-san and her granddaughter, and they were grateful." It was good to be able to talk with him this way again—they hadn't really talked normally since he was in the hospital. The silence had fallen between them then, too heavy to break, but this vacation had cracked it down the middle.

"Tell me about what happened."

She told him about the bandit attack.

"That could have been an arranged event, to see what you would do."

She frowned up at him. "But why?"

"Perhaps the kitsunes find you interesting. Without asking them, it's impossible to know."

"I can't believe kitsunes would be interested in me." She shook her head.

"You're a very interesting woman, Nanao-chan. I've been fascinated by you for a long time now." He drew his knuckles over her cheek.

She wasn't certain of how to respond to that, so she returned to the topic of the kitsunes. "Whether the bandit attack was arranged or a genuine attack, that's how it happened."

"And she offered you a gift as a reward? The sake set you gave me?"

"No. She made me another offer initially, but I didn't accept it." Her feet sped up their pace, and she forced herself to slow.

"What did she offer you?"

She darted a glance at his face. "A ribbon," she said, unable to admit to the love spell.

"A ribbon?" He reached into his kosode. "Nanao-chan, was it this ribbon?"

The love spell ribbon lay coiled in his palm. She stared at it, shocked. "Where did you get that?"

"It was in one of the sake cups in the set you gave me. I couldn't resist seeing my present from Nanao-chan, but I though the ribbon was odd. I meant to ask you about it earlier."

She snatched it from his hand. "That shouldn't have been in there. This is bad, isn't it?"

"I don't know, Nanao-chan. It feels like there's a kidō or something else coating it, but it doesn't seem bad, necessarily. It's not just a ribbon, though. What is it?"

She crushed the ribbon in her hand, her knuckles white. A drizzling rain fell into the trees, chill and sharp.

"What is it, sweetheart?" He put his hands on her shoulders, and she could read concern in his eyes.

"It's a love spell. That's what Chiyo-san said."

"A love spell?" One of his hands eased her grip on the ribbon, opening her fingers. "How would something like this work?"

"She said that if someone tied it around her wrist and the wrist of the one that they loved, that user's feelings would be returned by the victim."

He rubbed the dull ribbon, as if feeling for the enchantment.

The silence was unbearable. "I didn't accept it."

"No?" His tone was even and she couldn't read his mood in his voice.

Her free hand fisted around a corner of the beach cover-up. The ribbon had been with the sake set, somehow, but it wasn't her doing. "No. I refused it. Something like this is extremely unethical. And I don't believe in love spells."

"Did you believe in kitsunes before this morning?" He raised an eyebrow.

"No. But that doesn't matter. I would never use something like a love spell, even if it was real."

He dangled the ribbon, allowing it to pool into her cupped palm. "Chiyo-san is a kitsune, and they are very clever. If she offered you this specific item, she must have thought it would offer some appeal for you."

"She was just being kind." The rain fell between them. What could he be thinking? "I would never have used it."

"But you were tempted, weren't you, precious Nanao-chan?"

Her breath caught. "If I was tempted—it was only for a moment. And I would never have accepted the love spell. I would never use it on you." Her hand clenched around the ribbon. It was such a small thing with such a terrible power. She pulled away from her Captain and threw the ribbon; it floated down into a puddle a few feet away.

"Nanao-chan?"

"I was tempted. Sometimes—sometimes I can't even breathe without you. I hate you for that." She started off into the forest, her eyes blurry from the rain and her tears of shame and anger.

His arms wrapped around her, and she was pressed against his solid chest. "Don't cry, Nanao-chan."

"I'm not crying," she said. It was barely true; her eyes were full of tears, but they hadn't fallen.

He pressed kisses into her hair. "I know you wouldn't have used it. Did you think I would be angry that you were tempted?"

"I'd never want you to be my victim. I—just for a moment— I was tempted." Her words were a whisper against the rain, but he caught them.

"You wanted me to be your lover?" He tipped her head up, and she saw his eyes were dark and hot under his hat, his voice matching them.

Her eyelids fluttered down. "I wanted—"

"Tell me," he murmured near her ear. His lips kissed the shell of her ear, warm against her icy skin.

Her hands curled around his neck.

"You're too hard on yourself. I wasn't shocked or angry that you were tempted. I was glad."

She looked up at him, her eyes wide and wet. The rain fell harder now. "You were glad?"

"A happy little thrill went through me, because Nanao-chan was tempted. Upstanding Nanao-chan wanted me enough to be tempted. Didn't you?" He kissed her cheek, down to her jawline, and then to the corner of her lips. "Tell me," he whispered, and her eyes closed.

"I wanted you."

He kissed her, one of his hands in her hair, the other on her back, pressing her against him. His lips were soft and his tongue tasted of tea. She swayed on her feet.

He broke the kiss. "You're freezing, sweetheart."

Her lips followed his, engaging him in another kiss. "I'm fine," she said, although she was very cold. The chill in her limbs was nothing against the heat of this moment.

"Yare, Nanao-chan. You're freezing, and you have shadows under your eyes as dark as bruises. You have to give more attention to your body's needs."

"That's what I'm trying to do." He resisted her efforts to kiss him, and she tugged on his hair in irritation.

He chuckled. "I will spend all of the hours you want kissing you and satisfying your needs, after you're warm and fed and rested."

She pulled harder on his hair. "Do not treat me like a child. I am entirely capable of taking care of myself."

"Nanao-chan is so rough with me. I don't want to treat you like a child, but I do want to treat you like someone that I value. I know you can take care of yourself. But that doesn't mean I don't want to treasure you."

She sniffed but released his hair.

He grinned, wicked and slow. "Nanao-chan satisfying her needs—that's something I'd like to see."

"That's inappropriate," she said, and nodded for emphasis.

"Is it?" he asked, his hand on her backside, and she stopped in the middle of removing his transgressing fingers.

Was it inappropriate? It would have been clearly so only days ago, but now she wasn't sure. What was appropriate when she'd admitted that she wanted him enough to consider a love spell? When they'd nearly made love this morning?

"Don't frown, lovely Nanao-chan. I'm only teasing." He kissed her temple.

She nodded. "We should take shelter. I don't want to go back to the inn yet, though."

"It's the most logical course of action. We haven't gotten anywhere in hours of walking."

She stepped back from him, crossing her arms over her chest. "I know that. And I would like to speak with Chiyo-san, since she was the source of the—of the ribbon. But—" She thought of the laughing women, of their continual torment with their praise of your husband, of their knowing looks, all scraping against the raw wounds of her heart, and shook her head. "I want to rest first." She wasn't ready to face that; she needed to gather herself, to find a reserve of icy calm.

"If that's what you want." He glanced around. "Our options are pretty limited. There was a cave a bit off the path back there."

"Alright, let's head there." Nanao turned back toward the path.

Her Captain walked to the puddle, pulling out the ribbon. "We might want to have it with us." His eyes were apologetic.

She nodded. The ribbon made her uncomfortable, but it was something the kitsunes had given them, and it would be wise to hold onto it. He looked very serious now, but somehow that wasn't what she wanted. "You lied, Captain."

"Nanao-chan?" He stopped his strides toward her.

"You weren't just teasing. You know that you would want to see that." She raised an eyebrow and walked serenely along the path.

His surprised chuckle made her lips twitch. "Is that an offer, naughty Nanao-chan?" he murmured over her shoulder.

"Absolutely not. It was an observation," she said primly.

"But Nanao-chan, I think you should make it an offer. The leverage something like that would give you over me is tremendous. You could name your price in paperwork."

"It's a poor negotiating tactic to tell me how much you'd pay when we aren't even bargaining presently." The conversation was light, but Nanao felt more uncomfortable with it now. Sex and work again—was that the extent of what he wanted for her? Just a Vice Captain that he could sleep with when he was bored?

He'd been talking, continuing the joke, but she hasn't been listening. "Nanao-chan?"

She shook her head. The cave he'd suggested for shelter was ahead, although it was really more of a small rocky overhang.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Thanks for reading this story, and thanks to everyone who reviewed, I appreciate it!
> 
> I wanted to give some general information about my upcoming projects here. After this story is complete, the next Shunsui/Nanao I will post here will be fanfic for the Week of Love giveaway at the [shunsui_nanao](http://shunsui-nanao.livejournal.com/) Livejournal community, happening between July 6th and July 12th. (If you're a fan of Shunsui/Nanao, you might be interested in checking it out; I think it's going to be fun, and there's a doujinshi prize drawing.)
> 
> After I post the giveaway fanfic, there's a Shunsui/Nanao story that I've been working on that isn't complete yet, but will definitely be rated at NC-17. I thought about editing down the sexual content to lower the rating, but I've decided the sex is integral to the story, and so I won't change it. 
> 
> I'm also doing a Byakuya/Yuzu future story this summer for the [Crack Ship Big Bang](http://crackship-bb.livejournal.com//) community at Livejournal, because I thought it would be a fun challenge. ^_^; And of course there are always a few Shunsui/Nanao story ideas that I want to write; I still love to write this pairing. ^_^


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nanao's vacation takes an unexpected turn when Captain Kyōraku follows her to the Fourteenth District.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Contains: Spoilers for the Lost Substitute Shinigami Arc, consensual adult activity.
> 
> I tried to work some of my slots on [my fanbingo card](http://pics.livejournal.com/r_dahlia/pic/00001qyz) into this story. Fanbingo is a [community at Dreamwidth.](http://fanbingo.dreamwidth.org/) This is chapter three of five; this story will be around thirty thousand words total.

"Calling that a cave is too generous," Nanao said.

"Limited options, Nanao-chan." He gathered up some of the branches and other debris that littered the cave. "Do you want to start a fire?"

Nanao nodded and began arranging the materials, using kidō and persistence to start a sputtering fire. "We'll need more wood," she said, and he arrived shortly with an armload.

"It's not all completely dry, but I didn't want to scout too far away, given the circumstances." He deposited the wood in a sloppy pile near the fire and went further into the cave.

She built up the fire, turning to him when she caught a glimpse of his bare back. "What are you doing?"

He held out the white shitagi that he'd been wearing next to his skin under his kosode. "You should change out of those wet clothes. This is the driest thing I can offer you, unless we go back to the inn."

"We're not going back there right now." She hesitated, but she was cold and her beach clothes were soaked. His clothes were not nearly so wet because of his hat and pink haori. He'd worn this garment next to his skin, so it should be warm. She snatched it out of his hand. "Do not turn around."

She moved behind him, stripping off her wet bathing suit and beach cover-up with economic movements. He slowly stretched, the muscles in his back and arms shadowed by the firelight. She swallowed, her mouth dry. Nanao pulled on the shitagi and tied it with dull fingers. There was a longing in her belly for him that had started in the lake and hadn't disappeared. Spending this much time with him might be hazardous for her heart, but her body desired his company.

He'd put his kosode back on, although his appearance was even more rumpled than usual, since she had his shitagi and one of his sashes. She took her clothes and brought them close to the fire, anchoring a few branches in the pile of wood to hang her clothes on. She was grateful for the dim cave; the shitagi was thin and fine, likely translucent in the right lighting.

Her Captain dried his haori near the fire. Nanao sat between the fire and the back of the cave, warming her hands, her knees drawn up to her chest. It was much better than things had been outside, but small shivers still went through her.

"This will take a while to dry," he said, draping the haori near the fire. He began to untie his clothes again.

"What are you doing?" she snapped, but couldn't quite draw her eyes away.

He removed his kosode with a flourish. His hakama dropped dangerously low on his hips. "Hold that up," she hissed, but he only smiled.

"You're still cold, lovely Nanao-chan. I like you in blue, but not on your lips." He settled behind her, pulling her back against his chest, his legs on either side of hers. The kosode he draped over her like a blanket. She sat stiffly in his hold at first, but gradually her tension eased as her chilled limbs tingled to life. He wrapped his large hands around hers under the kosode. "Relax."

"How are you still this warm, with the weather and your lack of clothes?" Was there a kidō or a technique for that? She'd have to learn it.

"It's the heat of my love for you," he said, and she made a disdainful noise in response.

"You're ridiculous." The words were sharp but marred by a yawn. She was warmer now, but the cold of the cave floor still seeped through her thin clothes. "I'm only doing this for your heat." She shifted until she was sitting in his lap.

He arranged himself around her. "Nanao-chan may use me in any way Nanao-chan pleases."

"You shouldn't make such sweeping offers." She lay against his chest, drowsy.

"As if I'd deny you anything," he murmured, and she stayed silent; it was too tempting to ask him for things that she could not have.

"Do you remember the Valentine's Day Incident?" She tucked her chilled fingers against his sides. He shivered. "Sorry." She withdrew her hands.

"Put them back, it's fine."

She returned her hands to his skin.

"Of course I remember that day. My cute Nanao-chan gave me chocolates without 'obligation' written on them for the first time."

"I'm surprised you remember the day for that and not for the fire that burned down half of our office."

"The chocolates were the most important thing." He kissed her hair.

"Do you really think so?" She thought back to that day.

* * *

_Last February_

"Just give it to him already." Rangiku waved a wooden spoon at Nanao. "You wanted to do this last year, but you chickened out."

"Be quiet." Nanao stared down at the box in her hand. A pink bow was wrapped around the box, and she agonized for a few more minutes over whether she should leave it on the box or not. "The bow—"

"Leave it on, it looks nice. And it's obvious that you tied it yourself. He'll like that." Rangiku mixed chocolate in a bowl.

"I don't know if this is a good idea." She looked up at Rangiku, her brows drawn together.

Rangiku set the bowl on the counter. "Oh, Nanao." She walked over and tapped the bow on the box. "Give it to him. It'll make both of you happy. The dancing you two have been doing for years is amusing, but you don't want to be stuck dancing when the music ends and the lights go out. Give him the box. Then you can do some horizontal dancing." She laughed.

"Rangiku-san," Nanao said. "Are you sure?"

"You're the one that he really wants. I'm sure of that." She smiled and then brandished the chocolate-covered spoon at Nanao. "Now go!"

Nanao stepped back to the door. "Thank you, Rangiku-san."

When she reached the corridors of the Eighth she slipped the small box into her sleeve. The last thing she wanted was nosy division members trying to peek into the office when Nanao gave Captain Kyōraku the chocolate.

In their shared office her Captain lounged on the floor in a patch of sunlight, stretched out like a cat. She hesitated before coming closer to him. The box was small but felt heavy in her hands.

"Nanao-chan was gone for a long time." He turned his head to see her, and his eyes snapped to the box in her hand.

Panic rose in her throat. She dropped the box in a collision course for his head and all but ran to her desk. There was no _thud,_ so he must have caught the box before it hit him. His reflexes were excellent. She resisted the urge to look up, focusing on her paperwork with an intensity that it did not deserve.

"Nanao-chan."

He was at the side of the desk, leaning toward her. She didn't look up.

"Nanao-chan." His fingers caressed her cheek, but she didn't move. She could feel the blush rising on her face. "Look at me, lovely Nanao-chan."

She stayed frozen, her fingers so tight on the brush that the wood began to crack.

"Please? My cute, cute Nanao-chan," he sing-songed.

Her hair fell suddenly across her face. "What?" She finally looked at him, but he was dancing away from her desk with her hair clip in his hand. "Give that back." She left the safety of her desk and strode toward him.

He gave up the clip easily to her snatching hand. She tucked it into her sleeve. "Nanao-chan," he murmured, and the tone of his voice made her freeze again. "You gave me chocolate this year."

"I gave you chocolate last year." She stared at his chest.

"That chocolate said 'obligation.' But this chocolate is blank. This chocolate is not an obligation."

"I could have forgotten." She swallowed.

"You don't forget." One of his hands curved around her hip. "Everything you do has meaning." His other hand curled into her hair.

Her head tipped up and her eyes met his. "What does the chocolate mean?" she asked, with a spark of challenge in her voice.

He smiled, slow and easy. "I want it from your lips, Nanao-chan. Tell me the meaning."

Her eyes darted to the window and back.

"Show me, then." His fingers stroked small circles on her scalp and back.

Her breath caught. He waited, unmoving, his eyes burning with a hunger that made her heart jump. "From my lips?"

"Yes."

Her hands fluttered over his chest, circling around the back of his neck. She drew him down and he came willingly, the hand on her hip sliding to her back.

"The meaning—" she whispered, her lips the slightest touch away from his lips. She could feel his heart beating fast and marveled at that. Perhaps this was as exciting to him as it was to her, this new exploration of their relationship. Her eyes closed. All of the noises of the division faded away. They were the only people in the world, and this moment was the only moment that mattered. After this kiss, everything between them would change.

The door opened, and a gaggle of women spilled into the doorway. "Captain Kyōraku, you're late for the Valentine's Day Romantic Kisses and Sake Party! Captain—" Whispering and laughing broke out like a rash when the women saw Captain Kyōraku and Nanao embracing.

She dropped her hands from his neck immediately, trying to step back from him. His hands didn't move. "Nanao-chan, it's just some fun—"

Her face burned with embarrassment and anger. She drew a wordless kidō into her hand that flamed just as hot. "Let go of me now," she said.

He dropped his hands, jumping away from her with a flash step; it was wise that he had, because the kidō blasted through the space he'd been standing in and cracked his desk in half, lighting it and most of the back wall on fire.

"Nanao-chan, please—"

"Go to your party. You will find women more receptive to your advances there." A kidō flame rose in her hand.

"We'll talk later, Nanao-chan." He left the office crowded by the avid audience of women. "The fire of love has burned a little too hot today, everyone! We need to evacuate this area for a while. Please follow me to the party!" His voice was cheerful, but she knew him well enough to recognize the insincerity.

Nanao put the fire out with a forceful wave of water that broke the back wall of the office completely down. She returned to her desk and dropped her head into her hands. What was she thinking, taking him seriously for even one moment? _It's just some fun_ , he'd said, and she wasn't sure he was talking about the party. Was she just a fun toy for him to play with when he was bored?

He'd tried to talk to her about the chocolate after that. He'd pleaded, begged, stolen her hair clip a dozen times, but she stayed icy and remote from him. On White Day he filled their office with flowers, chocolates, poems, and anything else he thought might persuade her to step into his arms one more time. She refused everything, sitting at her desk and working as if it was an ordinary day and she was not surrounded by a sea of flowers.

Even after she'd thawed enough to treat him normally, she'd never let them come close to the kind of situation they'd been in that day. It would be too much of a risk. He was too much of a risk. It was only when he'd been wounded so badly in battle that she'd exposed her heart again, and that hadn't been deliberate; her heart had all but fallen out of her chest when she'd seen him like that.

* * *

"Nanao-chan."

"Yes?" she asked, pulled out of the memory.

"If those women hadn't come—if I can't planned a party—what would have happened between us?"

She sighed and shifted to look at his face. "What do you think would have happened? I would have kissed you, obviously." She shook her head. "I'm an idiot."

"You're not. You're my clever and brilliant Nanao-chan." He rubbed her back.

"How can you say that, at least in reference to the Valentine's Day Incident? If I'd kissed you, I would have to be an idiot, given that you were later going to go to a party and kiss numerous women. There's nothing wrong with that, and there's nothing wrong with you. But I, of all people, should know the kind of man you are. I should know better than to do ridiculous things like give you chocolates and kiss you in the office." She smiled slightly, but without amusement.

"What kind of man do you think I am, that I can't have your kisses?" His voice was relaxed, but this was a dangerous depth for her to swim with him.

"You like to have fun. You like to play around. You like women. All of those things are fine. But I can't—" She rubbed her temples. "I can't talk about this clearly."

"You're exhausted. You walked enough to cross Soul Society today, I think." He cuddled her closer to him.

"I gave it to you because I wanted you to have it." She yawned.

"What?"

"I gave you the Valentine's Day gift because I wanted you to have that chocolate, without any words. The meaning was already in the chocolate. "

"I know, sweetheart. And I am thankful for that. But I still wish I could have tasted the meaning on your lips."

"If you wanted to have a special day for the two of us, you shouldn't have planned a huge party full of women." Her voice had snapped a bit at the end; she still had some of the anger and embarrassment of that day inside.

"It's true. But I'd never dreamed Nanao-chan would want me to herself. And as Valentine's Day has gotten more popular in Seireitei, more pressure is applied to everyone to give chocolate and get dates and show affection. Some of the young girls in the division were sad because they thought if they gave chocolates to the men they were interested in, they wouldn't get anything back on White Day, and some of the other girls didn't have anyone special in mind to gift. I thought if there was a party, everyone could come and when people asked about their romantic holiday, they could say, 'Oh, I was at the party at the Eighth Division, it was great!' instead of feeling lonely."

She glanced up at him. "That's rather thoughtful of you, actually."

"If I'd known you wouldn't really speak to me for months, I would have cancelled." He grinned.

Her hand slipped behind his neck. "If we are interrupted by a crowd of women out here, you won't be able to dodge my fire. The cave is too small."

"I like your fire," he murmured.

Her lips touched his, in the kind of gentle, slow kiss she thought he might have given her for Valentine's Day. He returned her kiss, but kept it light, using licks and nips at her lips.

Nanao deepened the kiss, sinking in closer to him. His lips left hers to travel across her jaw and down her throat. Her head tipped to the side; her body felt warm and liquid. One of her hands slid down the bare expanse of his chest, tracing each line of muscle with the tips of her fingers. At the barrier of his sash she explored the boundary before her fingers snuck under it into the fabric of his hakama pants.

He shuddered and his mouth stilled against her bare shoulder—her robe had fallen down her arms. "Nanao-chan—here?"

She understood his hesitation. This cave was hardly an idyllic spot for romance. But she was aching with need and her love softened her unyielding edges. "With you—anywhere."

"That you'd say that to me delights me. That you mean it—that makes me love you even more." He kissed her lips once, lingeringly, before drawing her robe closed and gently tugging her hand up. "But if we do this, I wouldn't notice if a kitsune came after us. Without knowing their motivations, it's too risky. I wouldn't be aware of anything but you."

She was still frozen from his unexpected declaration of love. It wasn't the first he'd given her—it wasn't even the tenth. But to hear him say it with so little artifice and so much tenderness was a shock. He wasn't joking. Confusion and hope bubbled in a potent mix in her blood.

"You're right about the situation. But I still—" She pulled his hair a little and he groaned. "I'm sorry." She removed her hand from his head, blushing.

"Don't be sorry. I like it. When we get home you can be as rough with me as you want to be. Tie me to my chair and have your wicked way with me." He grinned.

"As if I could do something like that." She scowled at him.

He gave her a look that intensified the desire burning through her veins. "I have no doubt that you can do that. In fact, I'm really looking forward to it."

She swallowed and rested her head against his chest. He was looking forward to sex in the office, to having the kind of relationship with her that he'd had with Lisa, the kind that he'd had with so many women over the years. Casual, fun, easy—none of which were adjectives most people would use to describe Nanao.

Serious, rigid, difficult—those words were used to describe her by others, and she was forced to admit that they were more apt for her. Lisa was right. Nanao wasn't capable of the kind of relationship Captain Kyōraku ordinarily had with women.

But he'd planned the Valentine's party so that no one would feel lonely and hurt. His heart was big and generous. He'd said he loved her, and it was a genuine moment. Perhaps he could give her enough of himself that she would feel satisfied. Even if he didn't love her as she wanted, if he would just be hers, exclusively, that could be enough.

That might be too much to ask, but the hope had taken root in her heart. It could be possible. But it was too confusing to sort through now, when she was exhausted. She smothered a yawn.

"Why don't you rest for a little while? You'll feel better when you wake up." He stroked her back in soothing motions.

"What about you?"

He drew her glasses off and set them lightly on the floor. "I'll be fine, sweet Nanao-chan."

She wanted to argue the question further, but her drowsiness was amplified by his heat and the relaxing movements of his hand on her back. She fell asleep listening to the slow beat of his heart.

* * *

When she woke she struggled to orient herself. She pushed herself away from Captain Kyōraku, blinking.

"Easy, Nanao-chan. You only slept for a couple of hours. How do you feel?"

Night was settling over the forest, but the sun hadn't fully dropped out of the sky yet. The rain had stopped and the fire was low in front of her. She glanced back at him, still blinking sleep from her eyes. He grinned at her. He didn't have the look of a man who'd been poked and drooled on by a sleeping woman, but she narrowed her eyes at the spot on his chest she'd had her head on.

"You didn't drool on me. But if you had, I wouldn't mind. It would be so cute, Nanao-chan!" He made a kissy face and she pushed him away with her spread fingers, standing.

She eyed her bathing suit and cover-up with distaste. Instead of putting them on, she rolled them into a small bundle and tied it up. The pink haori was dry, and she put that on over the white shitagi. It wouldn't be decent to wear underclothes only.

"It looks good on you." Captain Kyōraku rose, stretching. His hakama slipped so low she nearly ran over to pull them up, but stayed where she was instead.

"It's far too large. Put your kosode on. After one step of shunpo, you won't be decent in those pants."

"Nanao-chan just wants to hide my rugged good looks so that the other women don't admire me too much." He waggled an eyebrow.

"When those other women are kitsunes in disguise, I would hope that you would not want to be admired by them." She busied herself putting out the remains of the fire.

"You didn't deny it. Nanao-chan wants me all to herself." He grinned.

"Put your clothes on," she said, fussing with the dead fire.

"You can have me," he murmured next to her ear, and her eyes closed. He made it impossible not to want him.

She swallowed. "We should go."

He wrapped an arm around her waist. "We wouldn't want to get separated."

She frowned at him. He stepped into shunpo easily, and they arrived at the doors of the inn within moments. The fox statues in front of the inn looked as sly as before. Nanao drew in a deep breath. "Are you ready?"

But the inn doors opened before Captain Kyōraku could answer. Chiyo came out, waving to them, followed by Misao, who lifted one hand in shy greeting.

"Ise-san, Kyōraku-kun, there you are. How lovely to see you again. We were just about to head out to search for you." Chiyo smiled.

"How very considerate of you. Do you always attend personally to the inn guests?" Nanao asked, adjusting her glasses.

"Any time a guest of the inn is out after dark without proper supplies is a concern to all of us, Ise-san," Chiyo said.

"Thank you for looking out for us, Chiyo-san. It's the strangest thing, we found ourselves unable to leave the Fourteenth District today. Have you ever heard of anything like that?" Captain Kyōraku was just as friendly as Chiyo, but the tension in the air notched higher.

"Well, this district does have many fine attractions that could detain guests." Chiyo smiled wider, but her eyes were sharp.

"Oh, certainly. I found your lake to be quite enchanting. But that isn't the type of detainment we experienced," Captain Kyōraku said.

"Did you encounter bandits? Why only the other day Misao-chan and I were detained by scoundrels. If it hadn't been for Ise-san, I don't know what we would have done."

"Enough." Nanao reached into her Captain's sleeve and withdrew the love spell ribbon. "Let's speak directly now, Chiyo-san. Why have we been held here?"

"Ise-san, I'm sure I don't know what you mean." Chiyo still smiled but there was a hard edge under her voice.

"I'm quite sure that you do, actually—"

Captain Kyōraku placed his hand on Nanao's arm. "Chiyo-san, we'd like to resolve this as friends, so why don't we just come clean with each other? Nanao-chan and I are aware that you are kitsunes, that you have given us this love spell ribbon for unknown reasons, and that you are likely preventing us from leaving the district."

Chiyo's smile dropped, and she sighed. "This has not been our best work, I must admit. Normally you would have received a much more skillful treatment, but this is a bit of a special circumstance."

"A special circumstance?" Nanao asked.

"Yes. It's a test for Misao-chan. It's a coming-of-age event. To pass, she must do something important for or something important to the person that she's selected. That person is you, Ise-san, which is a very rare honor."

"I'm sure that it is, Chiyo-san," Captain Kyōraku said before Nanao could respond with the indignation she felt. "But Misao-chan hasn't directly done anything here, has she?"

"Misao-chan wrapped the love spell into the ribbon. She tried to give you the ribbon in the forest, and then she gave you the ribbon in the sake set. As it's difficult for her to hold her human form and speak, many of her relatives have agreed to help her pass this test, including me." Chiyo raised her hands in an apologetic gesture.

"But isn't that cheating? If this is a test for Misao-chan, shouldn't she pass it alone?" Nanao frowned.

"We're kitsunes, not shinigami, Ise-san. Helping Misao-chan is not explicitly forbidden by the rules."

"Even if it's not explicitly forbidden, it still seems inappropriate for you to help her with her exam." Nanao crossed her arms over her chest.

"Nanao-chan has rather strict ethical standards, Chiyo-san. I can certainly understand your desire to help your granddaughter," Captain Kyōraku said.

Nanao glared at him. He didn't need to make her sound so unsympathetic.

"Unfortunately we didn't realize that she had such standards until she refused the love spell Misao-chan made." Chiyo shook her head.

"Her refusal is a problem for Misao-chan?" His tone was relaxed enough that he could have been discussing fine weather instead of the trap the kitsunes had sprung on them.

"Ordinarily these tests use men as the subject, because deceiving men into things is usually very easy for our kind. But at least a small amount of talking is necessary for that, and I can hardly speak for Misao-chan in such a situation without arousing the suspicion of the subject. She would have failed the normal test."

"So you devised an alternative plan?" Captain Kyōraku asked.

"Yes. When we saw a young woman come to the inn alone, I thought it was a good opportunity for a love spell. Even if a young woman is alone, there's usually someone she longs for secretly. We used those bandits to gain an introduction and offer up the love spell, but Ise-san refused it." Chiyo looked more puzzled than anything else.

"But I would never use something like a love spell. It's highly unethical." Nanao held out the ribbon in the palm of her hand. "Please take it back."

Chiyo shook her head. "I can't do that, Ise-san."

"Please take it then, Misao-chan." Nanao held the ribbon out to her.

The girl looked flustered and shook her head.

"We're not going to take it back, Ise-san. The ribbon has been accepted by you when you took the sake set, and it must be used." Chiyo's eyes narrowed.

"I will not use it." Nanao flipped her hand and the ribbon dropped toward the ground.

Captain Kyōraku caught it before it hit the earth. "Chiyo-san, wouldn't it be best to let this attempt at the test go and try again another time? Nanao-chan can be very resolute in her convictions."

"No, we can't do that. You must understand, if Misao-chan fails this exam, she won't have another opportunity for a very long time. She'll be surpassed by all of her peers, and treated mercilessly by our people. She's already behind, but this failure would be impossible to recover from." Chiyo squeezed Misao's shoulder comfortingly.

"Misao-chan," Nanao murmured. The girl looked down at the ground, blinking rapidly. "I'm very sorry, Chiyo-san, but I still can't use this ribbon."

"Please continue to enjoy the hospitality of the inn and the attractions of our fine resort district. I'm sure that, given enough time, even the firmest of convictions will melt in the fine sunshine of this area." Chiyo smiled brightly.

"You're going to keep us here until I use the ribbon?" Nanao asked, disbelieving.

"As I said, you are welcome to enjoy our hospitality for as long as you'd like."

Nanao exchanged glances with her Captain. "You know, Chiyo-san, Nanao-chan and I are prominent members of the Gotei 13," Captain Kyōraku said.

"I do know that. And there is a certain risk involved in this for us. I'm sure you could kill us all if you wanted to do that. But the Eighth Division does not have a reputation for heartless murder outside of war. We intend you no harm. All that we require is the use of the ribbon, and then you are free to leave as you please." She raised her eyebrows at Nanao and Captain Kyōraku.

"What exactly is the effect of the ribbon, Chiyo-san?" Captain Kyōraku asked.

"No—don't tell me you're considering this," Nanao hissed at him.

"Nanao-chan, if we don't return, eventually others will come looking for us. There could be a lot of trouble and bloodshed over this. But if the effects of the ribbon are minor, using it might be a good solution."

"It's a love spell. Even the name implies the effect is not minor." Nanao rubbed at her temples.

"You're a very open-minded man, Kyōraku-kun. The love spell effect for the ribbon Misao-chan made will create a bond between the two united by the ribbon, and spark feelings of affection, attraction, and connection, which can be described as love." Chiyo watched their faces closely.

"How long does it last?" Nanao asked, curious in spite of her opposition to the love spell.

"That depends on a number of factors, from the strength of will of the target, the existing bond between the two, and the power of the kitsune that made the spell. Misao-chan's work is very good, although she is quite young. It could last for weeks or months, and very rarely, it could go on for years," Chiyo said.

"You can't give a more exact estimate than that?" Nanao restrained the desire to pace.

"This is magic, not science, Ise-san." Chiyo shrugged.

"There's no such thing as magic. There's only science that hasn't been adequately researched and documented." Nanao's brows drew together.

"You're a rather unromantic woman, aren't you? I thought that when we spoke at the garden you were open to the possibilities here." Chiyo sighed.

"It's been a difficult day, so let's save our regrets for another time. Chiyo-san, what are the exact conditions to fulfill this test?" Captain Kyōraku rested a hand on Nanao's back, massaging her through the haori. It was a good question, and Nanao wished she'd realized sooner—there could be some loophole or easy exit that would resolve things.

"The love spell ribbon must be used, and Ise-san must be one of the two tied by the ribbon," Chiyo said, and Nanao's hope deflated. Those were very specific conditions.

"Thank you, Chiyo-san." Captain Kyōraku turned his head, smiling wryly at Nanao. "Well, I'm already proclaiming my love publicly on a weekly basis, sometimes in song, so it isn't as if using the love spell would change anything for me."

"No. Absolutely not. Don't joke about this; we don't even know what it would do to you." Nanao crossed her arms in a strong posture, but her voice quavered when she spoke.

"Chiyo-san, Misao-chan, could you excuse us? I'd like to speak to Nanao-chan alone. If you would be so kind as to arrange for some food to be brought to our room and have the baths prepared, I would appreciate it." Captain Kyōraku smiled at the kitsunes.

Chiyo considered this for a moment and then smiled, looking relieved. "I knew the Captain of the Eighth Division was a man of the finest romantic sensibilities. I'll make arrangements for you with the inn workers. Thank you, Kyōraku-kun." The old woman turned toward the inn.

Misao began to follow her, but turned back. "I'm sorry," she said in a near-squeak, and then there was a small fox in her place, surrounded by the clothes she'd worn in her human form.

"Misao-chan, really," Chiyo scolded, picking up the clothes and walking into the inn, the small fox following behind her.

"They think you're going to persuade me to use the love spell. That's why they were so happy." Nanao watched the kitsunes disappear into the inn. Night had fallen fully now, though she and Captain Kyōraku were illuminated by the lights of the inn.

"Nanao-chan—"

"No, don't." She took a few steps away from him. "Don't ask me to do that to you, I won't."

He closed the distance between them, caressing her cheek with one hand. "Nanao-chan, I love you, and our relationship is already going to change. You know that, don't you? So this little ribbon, it doesn't matter. Nothing is going to happen to me if you use it. I already want you, and nothing will change that."

She closed her eyes against the persuasion in his eyes, but still endured the persuasion of his voice. "You say those things so easily, and perhaps you do mean them now. In this moment, perhaps you feel that way. But if I use this love spell on you, how will I know that if you say that you love me in six months or a year from now that it's because you genuinely do still feel that for me, and not because of the artificial influence of the love spell? How can you ask me to do that to you?"

"Nanao-chan, what I feel is genuine."

"I don't doubt that you feel something for me. But I've known you for a long time. You've felt a lot of things for a lot of people. I don't doubt that those feelings were all legitimate. But they passed, didn't they? I can't use a love spell on you, because I know that. Even if using it meant that I could have what I'd wanted with you, I don't want it if it's a lie. I could never believe in it."

She hadn't realized she was crying until his thumbs brushed the tears off her cheeks. "I understand, Nanao-chan. And I'm sorry."

"Don't be sorry. You haven't done anything wrong."

"You keep saying that, but somehow it's hard to feel that way when you won't believe in me."

She flinched, though his voice was gentle. "I wouldn't use that ribbon on anyone. And I can't believe you're disappointed that I won't use a kitsune love spell on you."

"When you put it like that, it does seem a bit ridiculous, but somehow I am disappointed." He smiled at her, but his eyes were sad.

"I'm sorry. I can't."

He pulled her into an embrace. "I know. Don't worry about it, Nanao-chan." He kissed her temple. "Forget about the love spell. We'll just have to find another way out of the situation. For now, let's go inside. We'll have some food and hot baths. Everything will seem better after that."

"Hot baths," she repeated, longing in her voice.

"It sounds even more appealing when you say it, Nanao-chan." He guided her into the inn, one arm around her waist.

She didn't bother to push him off; what would be the point now? She wanted his closeness, and it wasn't as if the kitsunes would be shocked or gossip about the inappropriate behavior. Instead, the faces of the two kitsune inn workers broke into wide smiles when they saw Nanao and her Captain.

"Ise-dono, it's so good to see you with your handsome husband again," one said.

"You're so lucky, Ise-dono, he's so considerate," the other said.

"I'm so lucky," Nanao echoed.

The women laughed, appearing delighted. Captain Kyōraku led her through the maze of corridors to their room. True to her word, Chiyo had gotten food sent up, mountains of it, all smelling and looking delicious.

Nanao sat with the banquet spread before her, dropping the pink haori off of her body. The sleeves were much too long to eat in. She ate with single-minded focus; she hadn't realized how hungry she was until now.

He sat across from her, watching her eat. "Are you alright, Nanao-chan?"

"Haven't you heard? I'm a very lucky woman. That's what everyone keeps telling me." She popped an octopus fritter into her mouth. "You should have one of these, they're very good."

He obligingly ate one of the fritters. "Did those women upset you? Nanao-chan, it's a deliberate part of the way that they lay the trap for you. They want to increase your temptation to use the love spell, that's all. You can't take them seriously."

He would be a handsome and considerate husband, though. She laughed slightly. He was not her husband. He would never be her husband. But if the foxes had gotten her to entertain the notion for a moment, they'd succeeded, at least a little, hadn't they?

"Nanao-chan?" He had concern in his eyes.

She shook her head. "I'm just tired."

"If you want to go to sleep—"

"No. I'm not going to bed without washing first. I'm much too dirty." She looked down at herself in distaste.

"Nanao-chan is always lovely to me." His expression was soft.

She stood, stretching, and padded over to pick up the things she wanted for her bath. "You're just saying that because this robe is a little transparent."

His eyes rounded in surprise, and she laughed.

"Nanao-chan, you knew? Why didn't you—"

She paused on her way to the door and leaned down to his ear, biting the lobe softly. "Maybe I wanted you to look."

She strode out into the hall, ignoring the "Nanao-chan?" that followed.

A smile of satisfaction climbed onto her face. Maybe the kitsunes were getting the better of her, but she could still get the better of _him_ , and that was something.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nanao's vacation takes an unexpected turn when Captain Kyōraku follows her to the Fourteenth District.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Contains:** Spoilers for the Lost Substitute Shinigami Arc, consensual adult activity.
> 
>  **A/N:** I tried to work some of my slots on [my fanbingo card](http://pics.livejournal.com/r_dahlia/pic/00001qyz) into this story. Fanbingo is a [community at Dreamwidth.](http://fanbingo.dreamwidth.org/) This is chapter four of five; this story will be around thirty thousand words total.  This chapter and the last one are a bit shorter, the natural breaks in the action just ended up that way. I'll get the next one up in a few days and finish this story.

Sitting on a stool in the privacy of the extravagant bath, Nanao admitted to herself that she had wanted him to look at her.

Her hands ran over her breasts, and she shivered. If only they were his hands, rougher and larger—

She sighed and dropped her hands. Thinking about him this way did nothing to ease the ache in her belly. She'd wanted him inside of her this morning at the beach, and nothing that happened today—not the arguments, the love spell, the rotating landscape, the uncooperative weather, or the scheming kitsunes—had changed that.

She wanted him inside of her.

The water of the bath was wonderfully warm and soothing. She relaxed, her head leaning back on a towel, alone in a bath that could have held twenty. The door from the dressing area opened, and somehow it was not a surprise to see Captain Kyōraku there, a bath basket and a small towel the only things maintaining his decency.

"I'm sorry, Nanao-chan, they assured me that this was the men's bath. I'll go."

"Do you really think that you'll find the men's bath if you leave?" She raised an eyebrow at him.

"That's a good point. I'll wait in the dressing area until you're done." He appeared conflicted about how to leave without offending her modesty, finally beginning to back up toward the door.

"You don't have to leave," she said.

"Nanao-chan?" He looked so shocked that she laughed.

"The kitsunes may interfere with us less if they believe things are going the way that they want. Besides, I'm close to falling asleep in the bath. You can make sure that I don't drown. There's obviously room." She waved a hand over the water of the bath.

"If that's what you want, Nanao-chan. I'll stay." He shifted to a stool, and she leaned her head back again, closing her eyes. It was one thing to ask him to stay, but it would take a level of boldness Nanao wasn't sure she possessed to openly watch him wash himself.

She peeked instead. He was such a handsome figure, his muscles strong, his chest covered with hair, his skin sun-kissed, and his hair long and curling. She wanted to press her fingers into that hair, to touch that firm muscle, to kiss his full lips. He was so attractive to her that even peeks were too arousing for her senses. She kept her eyes firmly closed when she heard his footsteps and the sound of the water closing around him.

After a few minutes had passed, Nanao opened her eyes and darted a glance at him. He looked relaxed, leaning back in the bath. His posture was comfortable, as if he bathed in the women's bath all the time. Perhaps he did bathe with women regularly; Nanao didn't know. The corners of her mouth turned down.

His small towel covered his lap—although it was not neatly folded, as the towel in her lap was—and it was poor camouflage for his arousal. Maybe he was not as comfortable as he'd appeared at first glance. She wanted him so much, but could she have him? Her brow creased and she let out her breath in an audible sigh.

"Feeling better, Nanao-chan?" She turned her head toward him. His eyes skipped up from where the water lapped at the curves of her breasts to her eyes.

"Much better. But I still ache in places." She sighed again, and his eyes slipped to her lips.

"Do you? I wouldn't want my Nanao-chan to be uncomfortable. I'll gladly offer to massage any of your aching parts." He grinned. This was the kind of innuendo-laced offer he'd made her for years, and she'd never accepted.

"Would you?" She shifted enough to raise her legs and wiggle her toes out of the water. "Even my feet?"

A flash of surprise crossed his face. "It would be my pleasure." He moved closer to her until he could draw her feet across his thighs. His fingers were nimble and strong, and she enjoyed the movement of his hands over her sore arches. "What would people say if I told them I caressed Nanao-chan's skin in the women's bath?"

"Tell anyone you like, no one will believe you." She was relaxing back into the bath, even as desire for him ran through her with every beat of her heart.

He chuckled. "You're right. But I don't need anyone to believe me, because I know it happened."

She smiled slightly.

He continued his massage, switching his attention to her other foot. A moan escaped her lips when he pressed a sensitive spot; his eyes darkened. "Nanao-chan."

"You're very good at this," she said, defending her lapse.

"There are essential skills a man must have, lovely Nanao-chan, and this is one of them."

"That hardly seems true." She raised her brow at him, but the effect was lost when another small sound of pleasure left her mouth.

"It is. But this isn't my best work. If we did this properly, with oil and a bed, I think you'd enjoy it much more. I think you'd give me a lot of beautiful moans."

She tilted her head, regarding him through heavy-lidded eyes. "Maybe. But not for my feet."

His reaction made her lips curve. "Nanao-chan, are you flirting with me?" he asked, sounding intrigued.

She considered that for a moment. "No. I want to seduce you. I was flirting with you earlier today, but now I am attempting a seduction."

His hands stilled on her foot. "You want to seduce me?" His eyes had an intensity that was nearly predatory, but his facial expression was soft.

"Yes."

He looked off at the door of the bath, but said nothing.

She pulled her feet away from his lap and stood. His eyes immediately came to her, which was both pleasing and embarrassing. She crossed the distance between them with a faint blush on her cheeks and a small towel in her hand.

Nanao leaned down to his ear, resting a hand on his shoulder for balance. "I'm heading back to the room now. I'm going to bed. I want you to come." Her voice dropped to a whisper. "I'm inviting you to my bed. Consider your decision carefully; this is an invitation that won't be repeated." She kissed him once, chastely on the cheek, and then rose, walking out of the bath.

"Nanao-chan, why?"

She hesitated, afraid that if she said anything she'd say everything. But she wanted to give him enough to say yes to her. Her hand drifted up to her chest, above her breasts. She couldn't face him, so she stood in profile to him, enough to see him from the corner of her eye. "It's hard to breathe."

_Sometimes I can't even breathe without you_ _._

His breath caught, she heard it, but she fled out of the bath. Her heart was pounding in her ears and her hands tingled. She returned to their room quickly, her body still wet from the bath. Luckily she had not encountered anyone on the trip; she wasn't sure what she looked like now. She stood in the room with her sleeping robe on, but hanging open. The sash she held in her hand, undecided. Would he come?

She heard the door opening, the rustle of cloth, his quiet footsteps, and froze in place. He'd come to her. Panic and excitement competed for control of her body.

"Nanao-chan." His hand brushed her hair over one shoulder so that he could kiss the nape of her neck.

She swallowed. "Are you—" she started, but couldn't continue.

"I'm accepting your invitation." He strung kisses on her neck over to her speeding pulse. He licked and sucked at her tender skin, which made her gasp.

The sash fell from her fingers. She slipped the robe down her arms and let it flutter to the floor between them.

He made a pleased sound against her skin. His arms embraced her, pulling her back against his body. A small moan escaped her lips at the feeling of his skin against hers.

"Such beautiful sounds. I want to hear more," he said, his fingertips slipping over her nipple.

She drew in her breath at the sensation. "I want more than your hands tonight." Her voice had a sharpness that was at odds with the way her body melted against him.

He chuckled. "You can have anything you want, sweetheart. But I want to take my time with this. I want to touch all of you, taste all of you." His tongue brushed the shell of her ear.

"That's very diligent of you," she murmured, and her legs felt weak. She turned out of his arms and slid onto the bed.

His eyes traced over her body. She had an urge to cover herself, but she resisted; she wanted him to look. The heat in his eyes was worth any small embarrassment she might feel. "Diligence is my favorite virtue," he said, coming down next to her in bed.

"Liar." Her hands curled around the back of his neck.

"I'll prove it to you," he whispered against her lips, his hand on her thigh.

She opened to him, her mouth, her body, and reluctantly, her heart. If she could have held something of herself back, she would have, but she'd loved him too long and wanted him too much to keep her heart separated from her body. Even if she'd tried, the care in his touch would have drawn her heart out of hiding and into his hands.

He sought out her sensitive spots, listening for her gasps and moans. He lavished attention on the curve of her neck, the inside of her elbow, the softness between her hip and belly. His mouth followed his hands, his tongue slipping out to taste her skin. Her breasts fascinated him, as he spent long, hot minutes teasing her with his hands and mouth.

Finally she tugged his head up, catching him with her nipple between his teeth. "Nanao-chan?"

Although she was naked and glistening with sweat, when she spoke it was in the same tone she used in the office when he was slacking off. "I require your attentions elsewhere, Captain."

He smiled. "You can even use that bossy voice in bed, Nanao-chan? I like it." His hand skimmed down her body. "Your flower petals are so wet. For me?"

"Obviously. Captain—"

"No, Nanao-chan. I want you to use my name. Shunsui."

Any retort she might have made was lost when he slid one finger into her body, stroking. The power of speech abandoned her temporarily, and when she'd recovered it, she murmured, "More."

"Anything for you," he said next to her ear, and she dug her hands into his hair when he pushed a second finger into her body and his thumb rubbed her heated flesh in a way that sent sparks through her until she caught fire, tightening around his fingers.

He took her cries into his mouth. The kiss was messy and rough and she loved it, the way she loved the seductive promise of his voice when he spoke. "So lovely. I want to taste you, Nanao-chan."

"That's—" she started, but stopped. His heavy-lidded eyes were intense on her face. He was clearly prepared to convince, to coax her until her resistance fell away. But why should she protest when just the thought of his mouth on her made her shiver? She wanted him to taste her. "That's very diligent," she said, a heavy blush on her cheeks.

He grinned. "You delight me, Nanao-chan."

She scoffed, but her haughtiness dissolved under the caress of his tongue. He pressed kisses against her and explored her with leisurely strokes of his tongue. The velvety texture was an exquisite sensation on her skin. He brought her to the peak with a few focused touches. "So sweet."

She was sweating and breathless when she felt his lips on her again. "I can't."

"Trust me," he whispered, and the brush of his teeth made her gasp. The combination of licks and nibbles and sucking lit her desire alight again. Her toes curled into the blankets; the pleasure of this was incredible. His fingers pushed into her, and that was too much. Her cries were loud in her own ears, but she was too close to peaking to care. "Nanao," he murmured against her skin, and his voice dropped her over the edge.

When she came back to her senses he was watching her face from between her legs, his hand stroking her leg in soothing circles. She sat up, gripping his shoulders. "Come here."

He resisted. "I want to taste more of your honey."

She hit him with a grappling move like the one she'd used at the beach. He caught himself with his hands, his legs sprawled out, and Nanao on top of him in his lap. "Nanao-chan wants to spar in bed?" He didn't sound particularly concerned; he could easily have stopped her from flipping him, but he'd let her do it instead.

She shifted her hips so that her center rubbed against him. He was sitting up, so she leaned in to his ear. "I want to feel you, inside. Let me?"

He smiled. "You can have anything from me that you want, Nanao-chan."

Her heart stopped for a moment, but she forced it to start again, and she pressed her lips against his until her want for his love was pressed down. He'd meant that, but in bed—only in bed. "Thank you," she said primly, and he chuckled.

His laughter stopped when her hand reached back to circle him while she sheathed him in her body. She felt so close to him, holding him inside of her. Her eyes shut, her brow furrowed.

"Nanao-chan, are you alright? Do you want to stop?"

The worry in his voice opened her eyes. "No, I'm fine. I—" She curved her arms around his neck, hiding her face against his chest. "Shunsui."

His arms wrapped around her, pressing her close. "I know. I feel it too."

They stayed like that for a long minute. Against his skin with his strong heartbeat under her ear, she believed that this was as important to him as it was to her, that it was precious to them both. Love words hovered under her lips, but she did not speak them.

She rolled her hips and felt his heartbeat speed up. His response pleased her, so she did it again, lifting her head up and pulling back from him enough to see his face. His eyes were dark and hot, and the intimacy was too much for her exposed heart to bear. She closed her eyes and dipped her head.

"Nanao." His hand tipped her chin up. "Stay with me," he said, and it was a request, not a demand.

She couldn't resist the need in his voice. "Please," she whispered, without knowing what she was seeking.

"My love. My Nanao." He cupped her cheek and drew her closer to kiss her.

Her eyes had blurred with tears at his words. She kissed him with her heart exposed. The kiss moved from light to deep, playful to pleasurable, biting around the edges and sweet at the center. It was everything that the two of them were, and she lost herself in the kiss, in him, as he moved beneath her. There was no distance between them now, no silence—there were no words said, but their bodies spoke to each other.

Afterward she lay on his chest, sated and relaxed. She did not regret what they'd done; no matter what happened after this, she would always have this memory.

"You may have killed me." His voice was low and sent a thread of desire through her, although she'd just been satisfied. Perhaps he would always have that effect on her.

"That will not get you exempted from work next week. Death by sex is not a legitimate excuse." She sat up in bed, rolling her neck.

"Nanao-chan is a harsh mistress." He pouted, which she ignored.

"That is my job, Captain." She smiled at him.

"Captain, is it? You said my name so beautifully before. I really want to hear you call me Shunsui again."

She looked away.

He leaned on his elbow, one hand caressing the line of her spine. "I don't think you should call me Captain, Nanao-chan, unless maybe we're playing pirates in bed, and you're saying, 'Oh, Captain, I've been such a naughty girl!' Then it would be fun."

Her lips turned up at the falsetto he used for her voice. "You're dreaming."

"You're right. It would be much better if you were the Captain in that scenario. Then you'd say, 'Shunsui, you naughty pirate, what have you done?' and I'd say, "Oh, Captain Nanao, I've been very bad. Please punish me.' Isn't that better?"

She laughed, shaking her head. "You want to play with me?"

He sat up to kiss her shoulder. "Of course. We're going to have so much fun together."

"And where will we have this fun?" she asked, her voice light, but there was a heavy feeling in her stomach.

His arms wrapped around her middle. "Anywhere that you like, Nanao-chan. At home, in my bed—which is far more comfortable than yours, so much that you'll want to stay there—"

"You don't know that. My bed could be very comfortable."

He kissed her neck. "I know you, and I know myself. My bed is more comfortable, I'm sure."

He was probably right, considering the premium he placed on comfort. "Where else?"

"In the office, in the garden—"

"As if I would permit such inappropriate behavior in the office." She remembered the pleasures of his mouth and squirmed. "Certainly not often, if ever."

"You want me in the office, Nanao-chan. You want to play with me at work." He licked her pulse.

She smiled slightly. He was right—she would want him in the office—she'd want him anywhere. But those words—play, fun—they fell like lead on her happiness. They'd just been so close, so intimate. But what was it to him?

_It's just some fun, Nanao-chan._

She pulled away from him gently, rising. The abandoned sleeping robe she retrieved from the floor and tied, crossing to a tray. She sat and poured herself a cup of the icy tea, drinking slowly. "This made me happy. I want you to know that I'm glad to have been with you like this."

"Nanao-chan?"

For a few hours she'd let herself imagine that she could stay in the Eighth and have an intimate relationship with her Captain. But that was impossible. If she opened herself up to him any further, the pain when he ended their romance would be too much; it was already hard to bear.

"When we get back to Seireitei, I have to leave the Eighth."

"What? Nanao-chan, if you don't like what we did in bed, or if you don't want—"

"It's not that. I enjoyed what we did in bed, very much."

"Nanao-chan, I know this has been a rough trip—"

"No. It's not that, either. If I explain why I came out here, you might be able to understand."

He moved to sit next to her on the floor. "Please, tell me."

"I came out here to try and find a way to separate myself from you."

"What? But why?"

"I needed to rebuild the barriers between us again. You'd broken them all down over the years somehow, so slowly. And I was content with that, for a while—working with you, letting you flirt with me—I liked what was between us."

"Nanao-chan." He tried to place a hand on her shoulder, but she shook her head.

"No. What we had, it wasn't everything—but it was enough for me. When we were like that, I could pretend that I was special to you, that what was between us was special to you."

He reached for her again. "Nanao-chan, you are special to me—"

"Don't." He pulled back. "When you went to war and came back, when you were in the hospital, I told myself that I would try to become someone that you could want. It hurt when you left and it hurt so much to see you injured like that. I sat at your bedside and counted your heartbeats and told myself that I could be a woman that you would really want. I told myself that I could have more of you."

"Nanao-chan," he said, and his voice was so gentle, she couldn't take it. Did he feel pity for her? She shrank away from him, hugging herself, but it was too late to stop now, and she had to finish.

"I didn't know what to do, how to be someone that you'd want. I asked the other women in the SWA for advice, and they all gave me their best, some more useful than others. I thought I would try, when you were better, when things were normal again. But Yadōmaru-sempai and the others were invited back, and I was afraid. I didn't want to lose my position and the Eighth and my relationship with you—it was ugly, and I was ugly. When she didn't come back, I was so relieved. It was wrong for me to feel that way—"

"No, sweetheart, that's normal. It's not wrong to be relieved that your life wasn't changed, or that your job wasn't taken from you."

She shook her head. Her voice was shaky. "You went to the Living World to visit Yadōmaru-sempai, and I realized that it didn't matter what I tried to do. What she'd told me was true. I can't have the kind of relationship with you that I want. It hurt so much, because when you chased other women, I could tell myself they weren't important, that what was between you and I was special, but Yadōmaru-sempai is someone important. She matters."

"Nanao-chan, Lisa-chan is a dear friend. And I'm not involved with her, I told you that earlier. I'm sorry if you were hurt—"

"Don't, please. Don't feel sorry for me, I can't stand it." She pushed off the floor and went to stand by the window. Her fingers clenched her arms so tightly her knuckles were white. "It's not about Yadōmaru-sempai, not underneath. I know you aren't involved with her currently. It was just a clarifying moment for me."

"What did it clarify for you, sweetheart?"

"I'm an idiot." She glanced at him over her shoulder, smiling faintly.

"Don't say that. It's not true." He stepped toward her, concern in his eyes.

"I am an idiot. I let myself have ridiculous dreams about you. I'm a fool who took a joke too seriously. I was trying to find a way to be content again in the Eighth, without my dreams. But I couldn't do it. You followed me, and I wanted—I wanted you."

"You can have me, Nanao-chan."

She shook her head. "Not enough of you. I'm too greedy. I have to leave the Eighth, because I can't have some of what I want with you, without having more. It would hurt too much." She leaned her forehead against the window, trying to control her breathing.

"Nanao-chan." His arms wrapped around her from behind, turning her to his chest.

"No. Please don't, it hurts—"

"I know. And I'm so sorry."

The pain was so sharp that she couldn't breathe for a moment. She thought she might break into pieces on the spot. Her body began to tremble. He held her up with his tight embrace. "Let me go, don't touch me." Her voice was barely a whisper.

"Listen to me, Nanao-chan."

"No—no, don't—" Even though she knew already what he had to tell her, she couldn't bear to hear the words from his lips.

"Please listen to me. I never meant to hurt you, Nanao-chan." He was warm and smelled spicy. Small tears escaped from her eyes and ran down his body.

"I know. I know that already. I told you, I'm a fool, an idiot, and it's my fault, not yours."

"No. You're not a fool, or an idiot. You're clever and brilliant and so lovely. The failure here is mine. If I've made you feel like you weren't precious to me, if you've been hurt by my conduct, I am truly sorry, Nanao-chan."

Her heart was pulp inside her chest. "Don't be sorry. You haven't done anything wrong." She wanted this to be over; his heart was so big and kind, she knew that. He would try to repair things, try to console her and cover her with his sympathy and pity. "Just let me go. Please."

He held on. "Nanao-chan, I love you," he said, and this was unbearable.

"Let me go." She shoved herself away from him, staggering a few steps, and then sank to the floor. "I know you're trying to be gentle with me, but it's cruel. Please don't try to comfort me. After we get out of here, I'll leave the Eighth, and things will be easier for you."

He knelt beside her. "I don't want you to leave the Eighth. I don't want to be without you, Nanao-chan. I love you." He cupped her face in his hands. She blinked, trying to clear her vision enough to see him.

"What?" Her eyes met his, and she could see that his eyes were tender. She clenched her hands in her lap.

"I don't want you to go. If there are dreams that you have for us, I'm glad. We'll reach for them together." He stroked her tears away with his thumbs.

"I don't understand." Her tears had slowed, but her brow was creased. "Even if you say something like that, you have to know that I can't change that much. I'll never be like Yadōmaru-sempai, it's not my nature. I would want to have an exclusive relationship with you, a serious one."

"What did Lisa-chan say to you?"

Nanao sighed and closed her eyes, to shut out his gaze. "She said that she thought I'd be different. And she said that I needed to learn to cover my emotions better, because my feelings for you were so obvious in Karakura, and that it was my bad luck to want you that way. She was quite clear that you are too old for me and that I wouldn't be able to accept the kind of relationships that you have with women. She wasn't being cruel to me—on the contrary, she felt sorry for me."

"Lisa-chan doesn't understand what's between us, Nanao-chan."

She smiled slightly. "She knows you. Better than I do, and that's why she felt sorry for me. She knew I wasn't capable of the kind of relationship she had with you. And she's right. I can't sleep with you casually and call that enough." She looked away, pulling her head out of his hands. "I'm sorry. This is humiliating."

"Don't be sorry. I always knew that about you."

"That I was possessive and uptight?" She rubbed her temples.

"No, that you were a secret romantic."

"What?" She turned to face him. "You think I'm a romantic?"

He pulled her surprised body into his lap. "Yes. Because I know you, Nanao-chan." He nuzzled at her neck. "You're loyal, caring and intense. I always knew that if I found my way into your heart, it would be very hard for someone, even you, to dislodge me." He'd found his way up to murmuring in her ear. He licked the outer curve, causing her to gasp with surprise.

"But Yadōmaru-sempai said—"

"She doesn't know me better than you do, Nanao-chan. And Lisa-chan is not a romantic, in any sense of the word. If you said you had secret longings of the heart, she'd assume you meant you had longing of the groin and she'd tell you to sleep with the person and get it done."

"Secret longings of the heart is an overly dramatic phrase."

"But Nanao-chan, isn't that what you feel?"

"I wanted to sleep with you, but what I really wanted—this is the most embarrassing conversation." She tugged on his arms, her face pink, but he didn't release her.

"No, Nanao-chan, this is the most delightful conversation. I'm so happy to be having it with you now." He strung kisses along her jaw.

Nanao struggled for focus. Being so close to him was as overwhelming to her senses as it had been earlier. Her hands crept to his chest of their own accord. He was so warm, and the texture of his skin felt wonderful under her hands, and his lips— "When you went to the Living World—"

He licked the dip of her collarbone. "I wanted to see Lisa-chan because she's my friend, and I hadn't been able to talk to her in a long time. I also wanted to tell her about you and me, and find out what kind of conversations you'd had with her. It was obvious that she'd had an impact on you. In the hospital for the first few days, you were so open with me, so loving. But after you'd spent time with Lisa-chan, you moved farther and farther away from me."

"I didn't know what to do."

"I know, sweetheart. Lisa-chan apologized, by the way, when I saw her in the Living World."

"For what?"

"You were right. She didn't mean to hurt you. She was trying to protect you from being hurt by me."

She sighed. "I'm so tired of being protected."

"When people love you, when they care about you, they want to protect you. You've done it yourself, to others, haven't you?"

She had, with the kitsune love spell—she'd refused to use it on him, despite his consent, because she didn't want him to be hurt, to have his emotions twisted and falsified. "I have."

"Then you know it's not so easy to stop protecting the ones you love." He kissed her temple.

She tilted her head. "You're in love with me."

"I'm in love with you. How many times have I told you that?"

"Dozens. But I couldn't believe it then." She arched her neck for his kisses.

"And now?"

She climbed off his lap, standing and brushing his lips with her fingers. "Now I do. Come back to bed with me."

He followed her to the bed. "You should get some sleep, Nanao-chan. You're exhausted."

The robe fell off her shoulders, the sash discarded on the floor. He was still naked, and she reached for his hand as she knelt on the bed. "I'm not completely exhausted."

He smiled as he came down beside her, his hand engulfing hers, his lips pressed to hers.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nanao's vacation takes an unexpected turn when Captain Kyōraku follows her to the Fourteenth District.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Contains: Spoilers for the Lost Substitute Shinigami Arc, consensual adult activity.

Shunsui and Nanao stayed in the room for most of a day, sleeping, making love, and eating food brought in random intervals by smiling foxes. They left once to use the baths, and what they did there was most certainly an inappropriate use of a public space. Nanao scolded him thoroughly after, though she'd been just as inappropriate. He grinned through the entire lecture, his hand stroking her thigh.

Nanao was happier than she had been in a long time, but something was still nagging at the back of her mind.

"We have to go back," she said.

"We're on vacation." Shunsui held out a strawberry for her, and she took a bite of it. Being fed fruit in bed, naked—it was too decadent for words.

"If we don't leave soon, someone will come looking for us. Did you tell anyone where you were going?"

"Rangiku-san and Ukitake." He popped the rest of the strawberry into his mouth.

"Then we'll have a little leeway, but I don't want to push our luck. You were right when you said there could be a lot of trouble over this."

He sat up, smiling. "If you want to go back, the solution is easy enough, if you believe the kitsunes." He held out his wrist. "Tie me up, Nanao-chan."

She wrapped her slender fingers around his wrist. "I don't think I can."

"Nanao-chan? I thought you believed that I love you?" His eyes watched her face, full of concern.

"I do. I—" she struggled to find words for her feelings. "I believe it, and I'm glad. But if I used the ribbon, I would question it someday. I couldn't be certain that what you felt was still the truth. I would worry. It's my nature. But it's so good now, and I—I don't want to feel that fear. I couldn't believe you when you said it for so long. But now I know it's the truth, and I always want to know that."

He cradled her face in his hands, kissing her forehead. "We'll find another solution," he said, the gentleness in his voice closing her eyes.

"I'm sorry."

He kissed her. "I'm not. My Nanao-chan wants my love, and that makes me happy. If the kitsune love spell would make you feel insecure in my love in the future, then we won't use it. It's that simple."

She looked away. "You wouldn't feel the same way I do, if the situation was reversed. The kitsune's ribbon wouldn't make you insecure in a relationship."

"So? We're different people, Nanao-chan. You can't use my behavior as a standard for yours. Given how much you've scolded me over the years for my behavior, I can't imagine why you ever would use me as a standard." He began to kiss and suck at her neck.

"You're so confident." Her hands slipped into his hair.

"Yes. For a couple of reasons. I told you, didn't I? I knew that if I made it into your heart, I would be held in there tightly by you." His hand moved to over her heartbeat in her chest.

"The new recruits at the Eighth will tell you that my heart is made of stone."

He laughed, low and deep. "If Nanao-chan's heart is made of stone, then I'm carved into it." He shifted her back on the bed and pressed kisses to her breast, above her heart.

She couldn't deny it and didn't want to try, so she turned the subject. "What was the other reason you wouldn't be bothered by using the kitsune love spell on me?"

"That type of thing is most effective on the weak-willed. As the new recruits of the Eighth will also tell you, Nanao-chan's will is made of steel. A magic like the kitsune's should have a very minimal effect on either of us, if it has any effect at all."

"We should go and discuss the possible resolutions with Chiyo-san."

He squeezed a slice of orange over her breast, letting the juice scatter down her body. "Later." His teeth grazed her nipple.

"Don't think that I'll let you get away with this kind of behavior every day," she said, but her hands curled in his hair.

"We're on vacation," he murmured, following the juice on her body with his tongue.

* * *

"Can we speak privately, Chiyo-san?" Nanao asked, standing in front of the tables full of Chiyo and Misao's wares.

"Of course. Misao-chan, mind our things." Chiyo rose from her seat with a grunt, walking slowly out of the room.

Misao nodded, giving Nanao a smile and a look that was hopeful and worried. Although she did not approve of their actions, Nanao did feel a twinge of sympathy for the girl—as one of the youngest members of the Gotei 13 when she joined, Nanao knew the sting of lagging behind your peers.

Nanao followed Chiyo to the garden, and the bench that they'd shared during their night time conversation. "What would you like to talk about, Ise-san?" Chiyo asked.

One corner of Nanao's mouth turned up. As if the old fox didn't know. "I would like to talk about this, Chiyo-san." She pulled the love spell ribbon out of her sleeve.

"Oh yes, that. Have you decided to use Misao-chan's little spell?" Her tone was casual, but Chiyo's eyes had narrowed.

"No." Nanao stretched the ribbon between her hands.

"No? But I thought that you and Kyōraku-kun had, ah, begun a more intimate relationship."

Nanao's cheeks warmed. Had the kitsunes been spying on them? She dismissed the notion; even if she hadn't noticed, Shunsui would have. Besides, they had spent a little time in public areas of the inn, and it wasn't as if he'd made any effort to hide his affection or satisfaction. He had all but shouted it from the rooftop. "We have begun a relationship that could be categorized as a romance, yes."

"Then using the ribbon would not change things for you, so why are you still opposed to using it? I thought that your cautious nature had stilled your hand before." Chiyo watched Nanao's face intently.

"Putting aside the unethical nature of the love spell, yes, it was caution on my part not to use it before. But now that Captain Kyōraku and I have started a personal relationship, I don't want to question the sincerity of his words and emotions. That's why I won't use it on him now," Nanao said.

Chiyo shook her head, chuckling. "So you've moved from not wanting to take any risks to taking a huge one: that a man will stay true without any supernatural aid."

"I suppose you could see it that way, but in this case, I think that this risk is no risk at all." Nanao smiled.

Chiyo sighed. "I'm glad for your confidence, but this is going to put Misao-chan in a very rough spot."

"Chiyo-san, can you tell me the exact conditions for Misao-chan's completion of this test?"

"The love spell ribbon must be given by Misao-chan, and used by tying it first to the wrist of the spell user, and then to the wrist of the target. This can be done while the target is conscious or unconscious. One of the participants must be you, because Misao-chan gifted you with the ribbon," Chiyo said.

"I see. I believe I see an outcome that would be satisfactory for all of us, Chiyo-san." Nanao slipped the ribbon back into her sleeve.

"You do? What is it?"

Nanao told her.

Chiyo laughed. "So that's how it is? Well, it should work. Kitsunes only care for the letter of the rules, not the spirit of them. I'll thank you for this, with all of my gratitude. Misao-chan is my last granddaughter to go through this test, and I'll be so relieved when she's done."

"I wouldn't deny Misao-chan her future, when the solution is so simple for me." Nanao stood.

"Thank you, Ise-san. You didn't have to be so generous, after we've tricked you and trapped you, but I'm glad that you are. If there's anything the kitsunes of the Laughing Fox can do for you, just come by and ask, any time at all." Chiyo shuffled of the bench.

"I appreciate the offer, but I don't know if I'll come out here again." They strolled back toward the inn.

"I think you might be here again one day. Kyōraku-kun is a romantic man, isn't he? He'll want to celebrate anniversaries, and I think he would want to do it here sometimes. You'll be welcome as our guests. We'll give you our best seasonal rate."

Nanao laughed. Even saving a kitsune from certain failure only warranted a discount, not a free stay, it seemed. Not that Nanao would be coming back any time soon. "Will you know when the ribbon has been used?"

"Yes, Misao-chan and I will know right away. You can rest assured that you'll be able to leave at any time after using the ribbon," Chiyo said.

They were nearly back at the inn when Shunsui appeared around a corner on the garden path. "Nanao-chan, Chiyo-san, good afternoon. Surely I've found the two most beautiful flowers in this lovely garden."

"Oh stop, Kyōraku-kun," Chiyo said, and laughed behind her hand.

Nanao raised her eyebrow at him.

"I was looking for you, Nanao-chan," he said, and his eyes showed a little worry.

"If you'll excuse us, Chiyo-san?" Nanao turned back down the garden path.

"Of course! I'll be at my table if you need anything." Chiyo winked broadly at Nanao.

Shunsui caught up with Nanao, draping an arm around her waist as they walked. "I missed you this morning."

"It's actually afternoon. I wanted to speak to Chiyo-san, and I saw no reason to disturb you."

"I like it when you disturb me." His hand crept toward her backside.

"Stop that." Nanao tugged his wrist until his hand returned to her waist.

"Chiyo-san looked happy." They'd reached the bench where they'd watched the moon together. He sat, trying to pull her into his lap.

She resisted and sat beside him. "She is happy. She even offered me a bucket of questionable favors and the best seasonal rates at the inn," Nanao said, her lips twitching. "As if we'd want to return."

"I would consider it." He rubbed his cheek against her hair before nipping at her ear. "I enjoyed most of our time here. I'd like to stay longer."

"We spent most of our time in bed, Captain."

"I know. I loved it. And I love to hear you say my name—won't you use that, instead of Captain?"

"I'm sorry, but it isn't so easy to stop calling you Captain. It's what I've called you for many years." Nanao was aware that his touch was just within the bounds of public decency but didn't stop him.

"I can persuade you," he murmured, and she did grasp his hands then.

"Anyone could come by, and I need to talk to you about something."

"About why Chiyo-san was so happy, I imagine." He met her gaze, and his eyes were alert, although he was smiling.

"Yes. We did agree on a solution that should work for all of us." Nanao drew the ribbon out of her sleeve and held it out to him in her palm.

"Nanao-chan?" he asked, accepting the ribbon from her hand. "Are you going to use the love spell on me, after all?"

"No. You're going to use it on me." She saw surprise flit across his face.

"I'm going to use it on you? Will that work?" He rolled the ribbon between his fingers.

"It will satisfy Misao-chan's test, yes. She'll pass, and we can leave without any difficulty." She met his eyes, holding her face calm.

"That's good for Misao-chan. More importantly, are you really comfortable with me using this love spell on you, Nanao-chan? I know I said that I didn't think it would it would have much effect, but—"

"It's fine to use it on me. I'm not concerned with the effects." Her eyes slipped away, to the nearby stream. The water burbled cheerfully. Her hands trembled slightly, and she smoothed her palms over her thighs.

"Nanao-chan," he said, and the doubt in his voice made her sigh.

"Tie it around your wrist, and then tie the other end to my wrist." She held out her arm.

"Nanao-chan, is this really what you want?" His fingers closed around her wrist, stroking her pulse.

"Yes. It's a simple thing, so just tie the knots." The calm had slid off her face and a frown had replaced it, but that was entirely his fault.

"No."

"What?" Her head whipped around to see his face.

"No. I'm not going to use the ribbon until you tell me why you're fine with me using this on you, when you wouldn't use it on me. Just now, you wouldn't even look at me, Nanao-chan." He let the ribbon flutter into his lap to free his hand, and cupped her cheek.

"Why do you have to be thoughtful and caring whenever I just want you to act? It's annoying," she snapped.

He smiled. "Nanao-chan is important to me. The details matter to me, when it's about you."

She huffed to cover her reaction to his words. "I'm not going to explain what I tell you any further after I say this, and you're going to use the ribbon without delay or deviation."

"I'm listening," he said, and the intensity of his eyes made hers close.

She drew in a deep breath and opened her eyes. "I know who I am, and I know who I will be. I know this because I'm steady, reliable. I change so little that people in our division can tell the time by my routine. I am constant as the mountains, and I love you. I've felt that way for years already. So that ribbon can do nothing to me, because it can't change who I am."

There was shock on his face and wonder in his voice when he spoke. "Nanao-chan."

Her cheeks were hot with embarrassment and her eyes stung with hurt. She jerked her face away from his hand. The hurt surprised her, but she'd thought that he knew her, all the way through, something that had alternatively mortified her and pleased her over the years. "Didn't you know already? I thought that you knew—that you knew me."

Two of his fingers pressed softly against her lips. "Nanao-chan." His fingers slipped to her cheek when she stilled and tipped her head back toward him. "It's different."

"What?"

"It's different to know something than it is to hear it from your lips. I told you that before, with the Valentine's Day chocolate." His mouth caressed hers, and she let her hands drift to his shoulders.

He deepened the kiss, and she dug her fingers into his hair. "Wait. There weren't going to be any delays or distractions—"

"This isn't a distraction. It's everything." He pressed kisses to her throat.

"Sentimental." She sighed. "But I like that sentiment."

He smiled. "I have more. And we're still on vacation, anyway." He dropped the ribbon in her lap before rising and swinging her into his arms.

"I thought diligence was your favorite virtue." She raised her eyebrows severely as he flash stepped to their room with inappropriate haste.

"It was. But after much deliberation, I've decided that a different virtue is now my favorite." He undressed her with an efficiency that was actually rather diligent.

"What's your new favorite virtue?" she asked, her lips tilted up.

"Constancy," he said, and she made a sound of surprise.

"Oh, that's—" She shook her head.

"Tell me." He pulled her into the bed with him.

"Shunsui," she whispered, and it wasn't what he'd asked for, but it was what he wanted, and she wanted to give it to him from her lips.

"Lovely Nanao-chan. Let's linger a little longer."

* * *

They stayed another day, and Nanao enjoyed it thoroughly, although she did feel some guilt about leaving the Eighth on its own for so long. Their Third Seat was not qualified to manage the whole division. If she'd known Shunsui would follow her out here, she would have made arrangements with the First Division.

But the pleasures of having the memory of this trip were worth the extra work she'd have to do when they arrived home.

In the morning, after breakfast, Nanao sat on her heels across from him in their room. "This time, let's use the ribbon without delaying, Captain." She handed the ribbon to him.

"Shunsui," he corrected.

"Let's use the ribbon without delay, _Shunsui_ ," she said, raising her eyebrow.

"Are you worried about leaving the division alone for too long?" He twirled the ribbon around his fingers.

"You aren't concerned with leaving Enjōji-kun in charge for days? It was one thing when I thought you'd be back there within a day or two, but leaving our Third Seat alone for nearly a week? I don't even want to think about the possible mess." She adjusted her glasses.

"When you put it like that, it's a bit of a concern, but I'm sure it's not that bad, Nanao-chan."

She held out her arm. "I won't know until I see the office for myself."

"You weren't worried about the office before, Nanao-chan."

"I was worried about—other things. Now, I am not," she said, wetting her lips.

He grinned. "That's good. I don't like to see my Nanao-chan worried about serious things."

"Our office is a serious thing." She wiggled her fingers impatiently.

"If our officers file their bonus money reports a few days late, it's not really a problem. If anything really serious had come up, they would have referred to the First Division, anyway." He captured her fingers in his hand, raising them to his lips to kiss.

She shook her head.

"But since Nanao-chan wishes to use the ribbon now, I will. Although I would have enjoyed extending our vacation further." He tied one end of the ribbon around his wrist, and then tied a soft loop around her wrist. "Is that all?"

The ribbon was static, but there was an odd tingling in her wrist. "Something is happening," she said, just as the ribbon disappeared with a small flutter.

"Nanao-chan? How do you feel?" His eyes were a little worried, despite his previous confidence that no harm would come from using the ribbon.

Her eyelids fluttered. "Oh, Shunsui, it's so wonderful of you to think of me." She crawled over and climbed into his lap, one of her hands clasping the back of his neck. "I'm so lucky. You're so considerate, so charming, so handsome."

He swallowed. "Nanao-chan?"

She studied his face with satisfaction; he looked a little sick. "Shunsui, you're so generous, so romantic," she said, raising one of her hands to his face. "So easy." She flicked his forehead lightly and slipped back off his lap to the floor.

The relief on his face made her chuckle. "That was mean, Nanao-chan. I was worried."

"You were worried about what I'd do while I was under a love spell?" She tipped her head to the side.

He grinned. "No, I was worried about what you'd do to me after you weren't under a love spell, if we'd gone back to Seireitei and people saw you like that."

"The consequences would have been dire. Fortunately for both of us, the ribbon didn't have an effect on me." She stood, stretching.

He wrapped his arms around her from behind, pulling her back against his chest. "That's because sweet Nanao-chan already loves me," he murmured in her ear.

She squeezed his hand. "We should get going. I want to say goodbye to Chiyo-san and Misao-chan. It'll be early afternoon before we reach the division, at this rate." She stepped away from his arms to pick up her packed bag.

He took the bag from her hand, carrying it with his small bag. "I'm sure they'll be happy to see us."

In the large room with Chiyo and Misao's wares the pair of foxes sat, reading over a list on several spread-out papers. "It's complete, Misao-chan. I'm certain." Chiyo glanced up at Nanao and her Captain as they entered. "Ise-san, Kyōraku-kun, I'm pleased to see you. I have to thank you both again for your help."

"Misao-chan has passed her exam, then?" Nanao asked.

"Yes, she has, thankfully. I don't know what we would have done otherwise." Chiyo smiled. "Please come back whenever you like. We'll be happy to offer you the best seasonal rates, and any kitsune assistance you may need."

"That's very generous, Chiyo-san. We'll come back to visit," Captain Kyōraku said.

Nanao gave him a sharp look over her glasses, but smiled at Misao. "Good luck, Misao-chan."

They turned to leave. "Thank you," Misao said, her voice just a squeak. She popped out of her human form, a small fox sitting in a puddle of clothes.

"Misao-chan, really." Chiyo sighed.

Nanao waved.

"Misao-chan is a sweet girl, isn't she?" Shunsui asked as they left the inn.

Nanao nodded. They moved into flash step, arriving at Seireitei in short order. She felt a small pang of sadness as they reached the clean streets leading to the division, but shrugged it off. She was glad to be home, wasn't she?

At the Eighth Division, their appearance in casual clothes caused a small commotion, with shinigami running around and Third Seat Enjōji appearing in the doorway, looking hassled. "Captain! Vice Captain! You're back already? Ah, it's great to see you—" he broke off into nervous laughter. Papers fluttered out of one of the windows upstairs.

Nanao sighed.

Shunsui's hand landed on her shoulder comfortingly. "Nanao-chan, why don't we just leave them to it today, and come back tomorrow. I'm sure Enjōji-kun will have everything sorted by morning."

Enjōji nodded vigorously. "Absolutely, Captain. We just had a small mishap with the paperwork yesterday, but everything will be ready for you and Vice Captain Ise tomorrow."

It was against Nanao's instincts to leave a mess alone, but she did not particularly want to deal with whatever problems Enjōji had encountered now. "See to it that everything is in order tomorrow morning, Third Seat." She nodded sharply and walked out of the division gates, Shunsui following behind her, one hand on her back.

Members of their division murmured as they passed, and Nanao knew there would be gossip about the two of them returning together from vacation, out of uniform and with him touching her without any rebuke. When they were on vacation, it'd been easy not to be concerned with propriety; the only people around had been kitsunes running lousy matchmaking schemes for their own ends.

But now things were different; they were at home. How would things be when they were back in their normal environment? How did she want things to be? They could try to maintain the appearance that their relationship was the same as always; she could hold herself distant from him, refuse his attentions in public, and avoid the gossip that would inevitably follow them if their relationship became known.

They arrived at her home. She hesitated at the door, removing her sandals. Shunsui stood outside with her bag, waiting. He'd already known the question of what they would do in their regular lives would arise now, she could see it in his eyes, but he was waiting for her to decide what she wanted.

She grasped his wrist and tugged him into her home. He came easily, smiling.

"My bed is comfortable," she said, crossing her arms over her chest.

"I'm sure. But mine is more comfortable." He set the bags down next to a low table, cradling her face in his hands.

"Comparisons will be required. We'll need to make scientific observations about both beds."

"Absolutely. We'll have to be very diligent." He kissed a line across her cheeks and nose.

"Tonight we'll go to dinner somewhere nice, somewhere that lots of people will see us. And tomorrow we'll file some fraternization exception forms with the First Division. We might as well get the fuss over with quickly." She furrowed her brow, considering.

"We'll dive right into it, then? I like that." He kissed the crease in her forehead. "I don't want you to worry like this, though."

She sighed. "I'm going to need a vacation after cleaning up the division and ignoring all of the dramatics people will undoubtedly engage in regarding our relationship."

"We can go back right now, if you want."

She slipped out of his arms and wandered into her bedroom. "I don't wish to revisit the Fourteenth District so soon, thank you. But I've heard the Lake District is very nice." She glanced at him over her shoulder.

He smiled. "As it happens, I know of a lovely place in the Lake District. I'd be happy to go there with my Nanao-chan." His fingers slipped under the neck of her clothes. The sleeves of her yukata slid down her arms, and he kissed her shoulder.

Her lips curved. "At the end of next month, maybe? I think that might be sufficient time to resolve everything here."

"I can't wait," he said. He dropped onto her bed. "Come here, sweetheart."

"I'm going to have to make a list." She knelt on the bed next to him.

"A list about the beds?" He kissed her neck, drawing her down.

"A list of things you can't call me in public." She nipped at his lips.

"That's probably futile, sexy Nanao-chan."

"Sexy is going on the list." She ran her hands down his chest.

"I'll give you a few more for your list." He murmured names in her ear, some that made her gasp and others that made her laugh.

She smiled. Vacation might be over, but the two of them were just beginning.

The End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I tried to work some of my slots on my fanbingo card into this story. Fanbingo is a community at Dreamwidth.  
> The squares filled are: Seduction, Jealousy, Trapped!, Chemicals Freestyle - Love Potions, Closets, Caves and Other Tight Spaces, Magical Creatures, Vacations and Holidays, Exhaustion, Classics Freestyle: Blankets - Just for Warmth, and Wild: Yentas and Matchmakers. Despite filling that number of squares, I somehow managed to completely avoid any kind of bingo! ^_^;; 
> 
> I tried to do some different things in this story, and ran into some challenges. It didn't turn out exactly as I'd planned, but I'm happy with it overall. ^_^ I'll be back soon, posting my entries for the shunsui_nanao Livejournal community's Week of Love giveaway, starting next Friday July 6th.
> 
> As always, thanks for reading!


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